Chapter 32
Gosh I made it like 12 pages on word. Sorry it is short ):
It had been hours since I closed the letter and put it under my pillow but my heart was stilling beating so fast that it felt like it would jump out at any second. I thought reading that letter would make me feel differently, better. I thought it would tell me something important and I guess it was some good advice, but other than that, it was just a bunch of words. All I got from the letter is that everyone thinks I am a big baby that cannot handle the truth and that I am to naïve to see the bad in people. Every person in my life has said or showed that they felt this way, Baca, Josh, my mom, Logan and even Emily. Am I really that much of a child that nobody feels they can tell me anything? And to make matters worse, I cannot ask anybody about this because then I would have to show them the dumb letter. It is not like I can go to Josh and be like Rebecca left out of the blue. What is your take? He would just think I was crazy. I wonder if Logan knows anything. Would he even tell me if I asked? Probably, but he would have told me if he knew. He knows how much her leaving tortures me even if I never say it.
I woke up the next morning to the scorching sun burning into my back. Uhhh. Why does the sun have to be so bright and hot? I groan aloud and hear someone chuckle. "Not a good morning Ambs?" If I did not like him, so much I am pretty sure I would strangle him.
Angrily I ask, "What do you want Logan?"
He laughs again at me and I try my very hardest to resist the urge to be mean. "Your mom sent me in here to wake you up for our shopping trip.” How can he be so happy this early in the morning?
"Why did she have to volunteer me to go with you?" I say a bit bitterly.
"Ambi Bambi stop being such a sour apple and get dressed." He says a little roughly.
"Yeah I am getting up. Jeez. I hate how happy you are.” I say finally getting off my bed to make way to my closet. I grab a pair of shorts and a Beatles tank top and head towards the bathroom. "Okay I am up and heading towards the bathroom so you can tell my mom." He walks up to me and kisses my forehead before walking out of my room. When I am dressed and ready to shop, I go downstairs and find my mom and Logan talking.
"Morning." My mom says to me handing me a glass of orange juice and a toast. "Okay eat up we have a lot to do today. Let me go grab my purse and we can leave."
I munch on my bread and look at Logan staring outside the window deep in thought. "Logan."
He does not reply for a couple of seconds but then finally looks at me and smiles. "Yes Ambs?"
"Are you okay?" I ask.
He looks at me once more and smiles. "Just Peachey."
I giggle and rub his knee under the table as my mom walks in. Logan gives me a cocky smirk and I roll my eyes at him.
"Okay let’s go kids." My mom says leading us to the car but handing Logan the keys. "Can you drive? I hate the big hill we have to take to get to the mall." Logan grabs the keys and I ride shotgun. The whole trip to the mall my mom has her eyes closed and is lying back comfortably in her seat. I smile at her and turn to Logan who is giving me what can only be described as a naughty smile. He leans in slowly and kisses me full on the lips. When he pulls away, I can tell he is trying his hardest not to laugh at my shocked face that is looking between him and my mom. He is crazy. What if she had woken up? I would get angry but then again he would not be Logan if he took the safe route. Besides life never has a dull moment when I am with Logan.
When we reach the mall, I gently wake my mom up and she hops out of the car clearly extremely excited about going to the mall. "Okay where should we start? Oh actually we can start at Bloomingdales looking for your dress Amber. “She says to me as she begins to march determinedly into the mall. I groan and follow behind her with Logan hot at my tail.
"Ambi Bambi it won't be that bad. You’re a girl shopping should not be such a chore."
"Yeah well I hate shopping for dresses because I hate having to keep changing. I wish I could be like a perfect size so that I never had to try clothes on to make sure they fit around my butt or boobs."
Logan looks at me quizzically but then shrugs his shoulders, presumably deciding he rather not know what I mean. I grab his hand and pull him so he will walk faster. When we both enter the store mom is already running through the dresses. "Oh there you two are. What color do you think she should wear?" She asks Logan completely ignoring me.
"Please act like I don't exist." I mumble sarcastically so only Logan can hear.
"Um... I think Amber looks lovely in... Purple.” Logan says looking at me. I giggle because his cheeks are a little pink. Mom seems to think he looks quite adorable to because she touches his cheek and laughs at him. If Logan looked pink before after mom touched his cheek he was bright red.
Mom starts her search again trying to find dresses in purple. As soon as she is out of ear shot, "Aww Logan.” I say pinching his cheeks.
"Quit it." He says embarrassed and slightly grumpy.
"You looks so cute with your wattle pink cheeks." I say giving him a kiss on the cheeks. The second my lips touch his cheeks a cocky grin appears on his face. I laugh at him and playfully hit his arm for being such a boy.
Grumbling, "Ouch. What was that for?"
I look at his arm to make sure I did not actually hurt him and then say, "For taking my cute embarrassed boyfriend and turning him back into you."
He rolls his eyes at me not really caring and says, "Oh honey bunny no need to hide that you really wanted to kiss me."
"Oh puh-lease your cute but not that cute." I say darkly.
Pointing to his dumb grinning face he says, "Can't undo this smile. Sorry."
I roll my eyes yet again and "So I look good in purple?" I say with a sly smile.
"Uhhh. You’re never going to let me forget this are you?"
"Nope. I wish I had taken a picture so when I tell this story to people they can see how red your cheeks really were."
When we arrive home from the mall, Logan and I go straight upstairs both excessively tired from having to walk around with mom the entire day. Logan said he would meet me in my room later in the night so I just went to take a quick shower before I go to bed. My quick shower however became much longer because as soon as the hot water hit my skin I was so enticed I could not turn off the water. Finally, after pruning up from the hot water I grudgingly turn off the water and get changed into a pair of shorts and a shirt.
I walk out of the bathroom and am not surprised to see Logan sitting on my bed, but what surprises me is that he is holding the letter Baca left me. Looking at Logan's face, I can tell he is upset.
"Ambs, what is this?"
I shrug my shoulders like it is no big deal and hope he will not ruin this for me. "A letter Rebecca left me."
"Ambs did she just send you this?"
"No she left it for me before she left."
He walks up to me pulling me towards the bed to sit down next to him. "Ambi, why are you holding on to this?" He asks softly.
"Logan, she is my sister and this letter is all I have left of her." I state obviously.
"Ambs I know that you miss her and holding onto this letter is important but it is not healthy for you to hold on to this like your waiting for her."
I do not know why but Logan saying that makes me snap. "I know holding on to a letter won’t bring her back, but she said she would come back one day for me.” I say yelling at him.
His blue eyes soften and he holds my hand, "I know what she must have said, but it has been a really long time. I just do not want to see you get your heart broken again waiting for her or worse be disappointed that she was not at perfect as you remember. Ambs sometimes when people leave it is for the best."
"She will comeback for me, I know she will."
Logan wipes away some stray tears. "I hope your right, but promise me you won't go looking for her or snooping around trying to find stuff out about where she is. Not even to Josh or your mom."
I begin to nod my head but then," What do my mom and Josh know Logan?"
"I- Just promise me you will not ask them anything anymore. Your mom and Josh have been through enough Amber."
"LOGAN WHAT DO THEY KNOW?" I scream angry.
"Shh….everyone will hear you.”
"I don't care. Tell me what they know, what you know."
"Ambi. I do not think I should. They obviously didn't tell you for a reason."
"Logan. Please. I am not a little baby." I say with a pleading face.
"I know that."
"Then why does everyone insist on treating me like one?"
"We just want to protect you. I know how much you loved your sister, but she wasn't as perfect as you remember."
"Well yeah. Nobody is perfect."
"What do you remember of Rebecca leaving?"
"Erm. I don't know. It was like one second she was there, all happy and silly, and then the next she was gone. I remember her being really upset about something and having a fight with mom and dad, but that was normal. "
"Did you know when Rebecca left she was pregnant?"
"What? No. She would have told me."
"She was."
"She left because she wanted the baby and the parent's wouldn't let her have it?"
"Yeah basically."
"So they pushed her away?" I say furiously.
"No you didn't let me finish. When Rebecca left, she was pregnant. Did you know she was also a drug addict?" This time I kept my mouth shut just taking in what Logan said. "She left because your parent's wanted her to give up the baby because they didn't think she could raise it. They were afraid that she wouldn't be able to quit the drugs long enough to have the baby and even if she did what would happen to the child. Rebecca was furious when they said they wouldn't help her out. Before you get all mad at your parent's you have to understand that, they wanted a lot more for your sister than what she had gotten. Rebecca didn't want the path they choose for her which is understandable. But anyway, she started to hang out with Jayden towards the end of her senior year. Rebecca was crazy about him. From what your brother and I remember, he was a sketchy person. He used to take Rebecca out and get her totally wasted and just leave her at the doorsteps not even bothering to make sure she made it inside okay. Rebecca ignored that part for some reason. She was so sure that Jayden was the one so when news of the pregnancy came along she was excited. So when your parent's came and burst her bubble she ran. Your parent's went to the police, but they couldn't do anything because Rebecca was 18, an adult. They said it was her choice, the most they could do is get her whereabouts for the family."
"No. No. No. NO. She wasn't an addict. She wasn't like that. You’re lying." I say hitting Logan as he tries to hug me.
"Ambi I wouldn't lie to you and you know it.” Logan pulls me into a warm embrace as I cry. Of all the things that I though Rebecca was a drug addict was never one of them. This wasn't my sister. I mean I knew she drank and stuff but I never thought she had a problem. She was always sane when I was with her. "Sshhh. It's okay. “Logan whispers in my ear softly.
I don't know when exactly I fell asleep that night but when I woke up I was still in Logan's arms. He had no doubt stayed with me the whole night.
"Morning." He whispers sweetly into my ear.
"Mmm. Morning." I say back. He looks at my face, studying me. He is probably thinking I am about to cry some more, but I think I had cried enough last night to last me a lifetime. I didn't even know people cry that much. "I am fine."
"You sure?" He asks looking concerned.
"Yeah. Crying can't change anything." I say.
"Yes, but sometimes crying is just what you need to do to feel better."
"Yeah well I don't feel better. I feel ugly." I croak.
"You are not ugly." He says looking into my eyes.
"You’re my boyfriend Logan. You thinking I am not ugly doesn't count." I say half smiling.
"I would think your beautiful either way." Logan says kissing my forehead. He didn't bring up Baca, which I was grateful for. I think if he had, I might actually start crying again. I just couldn’t wrap my head around this. I mean the Baca I knew was so different then the Rebecca Logan told me about. Baca was carefree, strong, and confident. This Rebecca sounded like she was lost and in pieces.
A little while later Logan left and let me, take a shower. He seemed reluctant to leave, but I convinced him I was okay enough to shower by myself. I was glad because I think I need some time to think or not think. I took a hot numbing shower trying to get lost in the water to not have the B word pop into my head.
I think it is more crushing knowing that I had always idolized my sister and having Logan tell me the truth about her kind of hurt more. If I had known all my life that she had a problem and that was why she left I would have been able to accept it and move on, but not knowing I created this pedestal for her because I thought she was so great. It is like when you’re small and you actually believe in the tooth fairy, then one day someone comes and tells you the tooth fairy doesn't exist. It is like learning that some of the magic of your little life isn't magic at all; just your parent's fooling you into believing there is magic only to crush you later. I never believed in the tooth fairy but I always thought that on my 11th birthday I would get a letter from Hogwarts. The day I didn’t get one, I was completely heartbroken.
After taking a shower and throwing on some clothes, I slowly make my way down to the kitchen. The family and Logan are all sitting around the table. Everyone is laughing and smiling. For a brief second I am frustrated beyond words that they can just sit here all happy and jolly when everything that I thought about my family is completely a mess, but then I remember that all of them have dealt with their issues of Baca besides me. I sit down quietly at the table and drink some of the orange juice that mom puts in front of me. Logan gives my hand a light squeeze.
"Amber honey, show your father how you look in your dress after brunch.” Mom says to me cheerfully. Then she turns to dad and says, “Sweetie she looks so darling in it and Logan was right, purple really does look quite nice on her." Everyone laughs at my mom's excitement.
"Logan? What are you wearing?" Josh asks smirking at Logan.
Before Logan can even answer, though mom cuts in. "Oh he is wearing this very nice suit I found him. Classic black and with a matching tie to Amber's dress. They look so adorable together." And so brunch proceeds with talks about the wedding and plans for the day.
After brunch, I help mom clean up the table a bit. She goes on and on about makeup and jewelry. For once, I am actually happy that my mom keeps talking. Her constant yammering distracts me from thinking about Baca.
When the morning for Logan's dad's wedding came I was extremely nervous, not for myself but for Logan. I had put all my thoughts, emotions, and problems about Rebecca in the back of my head because today is really important for Logan. Veronica had called and checked again to make sure that Logan was coming for what seems like the nth billion time. I felt somewhat bad for her because she was supposed to be getting married today and she was all freaked out about Logan. I had yelled at Logan, making him call her to say he would come and not to worry. She seemed relieved or at least that is what Logan had said.
We reach Logan's old house a couple minutes before the ceremony is about to start. The house is decorated with lights and flowers everywhere. It looks absolutely enchanting. Logan parks the car across the seat and opens my door for me. I smile and take his hand. He playfully nudges me on my side.
"Nervous?" I ask as we walk into the house because Logan's hand is sweating.
"No.” He replies too quickly.
"Really? So then you popped a water balloon in your hand before you held mine." I say giggling.
"Oh sorry." He says letting go of my hand. I laugh as his cheeks turn a slight barely there pink.
"It's okay. So where do you want to sit?"
"The back so if I decide I want to leave we can escape without making a scene."
"Logan, he is your dad. No matter where you leave from your making a scene."
"Fine then where should we sit?" He says grumpily.
"The front on the groom's side."
He groans but pulls lightly pushes me towards the front. "Happy?"
I smile at him and give him a kiss on the cheek. "Don't worry Peachey it will be done quick. I promise."
"Yeah. Want to go make out in my old room later?"
I giggle. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"
He smirks and then leans in close like he is going to say something but nibbles on my ear. I resist the urge to moan and try to push him off lightly. When he pulls back, he is laughing evilly. "You want me."
"I was so going to go with you to your room but now that you did that never mind. I don't want to."
He rolls his eyes at me and says, "Yeah sure you don't." I turn to face forward and decide I am ignoring him but he leans into my ear again this time he says, "You look beautiful."
I smile up at him and say, "You look beautiful too Peachey."
"Right, that is what every guy wants to hear from his girlfriend that he looks beautiful."
Trying my hardest not to laugh I say, "Not my fault you’re feminine." He rolls his eyes at me again and this time he turns to face forward. "I am just kidding. You look very hot."
"I know. I just wanted you to say it."
"You make me regret ever being nice to you sometimes Peachey."
"No you don't. You can't help it." He says smirking like a cocky bastard.
"Whatever. Hey isn't that your grandma?" I say pointing to a old lady wearing a pink suit with a flower hat.
"Yeah. I can't believe she showed up."
"Well it is her son getting married." I point out.
"Yeah but she hasn't talk to dad since the divorce." He says gawking at his grandmother.
"Well maybe she embraced the motto forgive and forget."
Logan shakes his head. “She was madder than me."
I roll my eyes at him and says, "Yeah but she might not be as stubborn as you.” He opens his mouth to respond but then closes it realizing I might be right. "Are you going to go see your dad before the ceremony starts?"
"Nah. He is probably busy." I am about to interject when he continues, "But I will go after, if you come with me."
Give him kiss on the lips, "Of course and then later we can go to your room." I say giving him a naughty smile.
He chuckles and then kisses me cheek saying, "I love you."
"Well of course you do. Hello?! I am awesome.” Making him laugh again.
When the ceremony starts both of us shut up and watch as Mr. Clifton and Veronica exchange vows. Veronica looked absolutely breathe taking in her dress that makes her completely glow and the belly kind of helps too. I hold Logan's hand through the whole ceremony; he squeezes a little tightly when the part about the vows come. All in all the ceremony was a complete fairy tale but I don't say that to Logan because it would just tick him off. "So you want to go see your dad now or later?"
Logan makes a face. "Can we go later? I need a drink right now and after I think I want to visit my old room."
I giggle. Logan grabs a bottle of champagne from behind the bar and two glasses, and leads me to the stairs. We walk through the door of his room and land on his bed. He pops open the bottle and pours us both a glass. He gives me a glass and sits on the bed.
"So babe what now?" Logan says wrapping his hand around me.
"Hmm… I can think of something." I say sitting on his lap and kissing his lips.
"I think I know where you are going with this." He says kissing my neck. I moan wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling his lips back to mine. Logan slowly rubs my back. I moan into his mouth and tug on his dark hair lightly to deepen the kiss. He groans and starts unzipping the side of my dress while I start loosening his tie and unbuttoning his shirt. Logan turns us around so he is on top of me and I wrap my leg around his waist. Logan slowly runs his hand down my leg.
"I love your legs.” Logan says staring into my eyes briefly. I take that time to remove his shirt so I can run my hands down his toned chest. He groans again and bites on my lip gently starting up a whole another round of passion.
Half an hour later after a seriously hot make out session with Logan we both head down the stairs, but only after I fix myself up a little so it doesn't look like I was practically in Logan's pants ten seconds ago. Logan sporting his signature bad boy smirk ran his hands through his hair, put his shirt back on, and was ready to go. I wish I were a boy sometimes just because they have it so easy.
Logan takes my hand and leads me to the backyard where the reception is in full swing. I see Mr. Clifton and Veronica sitting at the main table smiling at each other in a grossly cute way. Logan leads me to our table that is in the very front near the bride and groom's table. When Veronica sees Logan and me, she waves slightly giving us both a smile. My smile seems more genuine then Logan's but I don't really blame him for not being overly thrilled. I guess I would still be a little angry and slightly annoyed.
"Hey I am going to go say hi and whatever. You ready?" Logan asks.
Dropping my fork, I get up.” Yeah." We walk over in silence towards the table.
"Hey dad."
"Logan." Logan's dad says looking slightly watery eyed. "You came."
"Yeah well women can be very persuasive." Logan says looking between me and Veronica.
His dad surprises me by chuckling. It is really strange to actually see him laughing with his son. I mean he isn't what you would call a big goof who laughs with his kid. Honestly he smiles less than even my dad and my dad doesn't smile all that much to begin with unless he is with my mom and she is being well like mom. "She can be a tad over the top at times." Mr. Clifton says looking a Veronica with a smile.
"Well, I just wanted you two to not fight because of me. It is all my fault." Veronica says crying. Logan looks at me unsure of what to do but I don't really know what to say. Mr. Clifton hands her a napkin. "Sorry. I seem to be crying a lot these days. Pregnancy hormones. "Veronica says trying to laugh. I look awkwardly at the dance floor not really sure how to reply. Logan just smiles politely.
“Erm. Amber and I are going to be leaving and we just wanted to say hi before we left."
"Oh. Stay for the cake at least." Logan's dad says.
"I promised Mrs. Thorn I would have Amber back home before it gets too late because she has plans." Logan says.
"Oh alright then. Bye son."
"Bye Logan and thank you for coming. It meant the world to me to have you share this day with me and your father."
"Yeah.” We wave our byes and head back into the house.
"I have plans?" I ask Logan once we are out of earshot.
"Yeah sorry. I get that they are all happy and stuff, but I don't think I could take any more of their love-y faces. "
I shrug my shoulders. "Whatever. I don't really enjoy watching old people make out. It creeps me out slightly."
Logan laughs and leads me to the car.
A week had passed since I learned the truth about Rebecca and I think I had finally come to terms with the truth. I never brought up the Rebecca with my parents or Josh deciding Logan was probably right when he said they didn't need to go through that again.
Today was the night of the art exhibit that featured my painting of Logan and me in our old age. Mrs. Olsen had asked me bring in my portfolio so she could help me decide what I should put in the show. She saw the painting I had made of my dream from the beginning of the year and said she thought it was perfect. My parents, Josh, Logan, and Emily had all agreed to come to see my painting in the exhibit. It was nerve racking but I was excited to have them see my work because nobody aside from Logan had actually ever seen my paintings. Mrs. Olsen had me come in early to the exhibit to set up so I got a chance to see other people's work too, which only added to my nervousness because all the painters in the exhibit seemed like hardcore. Their paintings all seemed to intricate with obscure names like Obtuse, but Mrs. Olsen assured me that my painting was fine and I was just letting the nerves get to me.
At seven, the exhibit opened and a dignified looking man in a black suit talked about these being the works of exceptionally talented artist who were only beginning to blossom into their full potential. He rambled on for a while and then we everyone was free to look around.
"Dang Girl!!!!!!!" Em says as she sees my art. I laugh. "I mean I knew you were good but I never knew you were this good."
"Thanks Em."
"Oh honey, it is absolutely beautiful. What was your inspiration?"
"Thank you mom. It was a dream I had awhile back." I smile at Logan. I never did tell him it was a painting of me and him, but something tells me I am not meant to.
"Must have been some dream. This painting is absolutely amazing and the emotions are so raw."
"Thank you."
"Ambi Bambi this is amazing." Logan whispers in my ear.
"Thanks Peachey." I say.
"Crap Amber this is awesome."
"Hehehe. Thanks bro."
"Amber you’re an artist." My dad says as he looks at my painting. That moment was the highlight of my night. I had never thought I would hear someone call me an artist.
After the show is over, I head towards the car. Josh and Logan are inside checking out some mural of a naked chick that they both thought was awesome. I rolled my eyes at them and said I would wait by the car. While I am waiting, I see a couple sucking face outside the exhibit. The girl has her legs wrapped around the guy and his hand is roaming her body hungrily. Dang, they are really getting into it. If the boys were so keen on seeing practical porn, they should have come out here. When they take a moment to breath, I realize that I know that girl. EMILY.
"EMILY?" I question.
"A-Amber?" Em says looking at me in horror. I can't see who she is making out with but I can tell it is someone she didn’t want me to see her with.
"Em, Have anything you like to share with me?" I ask teasingly looking between her and the guy.
"Erm…I don’t think so."
"Em!!!!!!!!" I moan sadly.
"Nice painting Amber." An all too familiar voice says to me.
"Shut up." Em says to mystery man.
"Relax. It is Amber."
"Rick?" I finally ask.
"Hey Amber." He says turning around to face me.
"You and Emily?! Holy crap." I say.
"Holy crap? That is all you have to say? Holy crap? " Emily says angrily.
"Erm… I know I told you to be nice to him but I never expected you to be this nice.” I say.
"I am making out with the cheater who broke your heart." Emily says looking disappointed in herself. Rick looks guiltily between me and Emily.
"I know. I can see and so can the ENTIRE world." I say.
"I am so going to hell. I am so sorry. I claim to be your best friend and then I am with Icky Ricky.” She looks so sad, I feel bad.
"Emily. Relax. I don't really care. I am in love with Logan. Really you and Rick deciding to play tonsil hockey is none of my business even if it is kind of tacky to make out with someone outside the exit and be shocked when someone sees you."
"I am so seriously sorry. I never meant for you to find out like this."
"Emily, don't worry about it. I am in love with Logan. So who cares if you are dating Icky Ricky?"
"Thanks." Rick says sarcastically.
"Your welcome." I giggle. "I just can’t believe your mystery man is Rick. I mean you hate him or hated him"
"My mystery man?" Emily says.
"Oh well I saw you holding someone's hand awhile back so I called him your mystery man.”
"You knew I was dating someone and you didn't say anything?"
"I thought you just wanted some privacy. Besides secret dating someone can be very amusing." I say remembering my make out lust filled make out session with Logan. It always seemed more fun because it was like a double adrenaline rush of passion and the thrill of no getting caught.
"I never told you cause I thought you would get mad and because you’re always busy with Logan so I feel out of place."
"Out of place? Logan, you, me and Josh used to spend loads of time together at my house."
"Yeah but now you guys are a couple, so it is Logan and Amber, Josh with whatever whore he happens to be with at the time and me.” Until Emily had said it, I hadn't really noticed what a crap best friend I had been to her. I can't even remember the last time it was just me and her. I never thought I would be one of those girls who leaves all her friends behind for some guy. Gosh, I suck.
"I am sorry for not being a good friend to you Em." I say running up to her and giving he a hug. "God I suck. I blame Logan for all this. Stupid boy."
"Blame me for what?” Logan says showing up outside.
"Making me ignore Emily." I say angrily at him.
"And how exactly is that my fault Ambs?"
"You Mister have very persuasive lips." I say.
"Not my fault I am irresistible." Logan says cockily.
"Somehow I find it easier to resist you." I say at Logan teasingly.
"So want to go get a chocolate milkshake with a cherry on top guys?" Emily says laughing at me and Logan.
"I do love cherries!!!!!!!" I scream and grab Emily's hand pulling her towards the car. We wait for a boys to walk to us in there painstakingly slow pace, but the cherry buzz kind of gets the better of me. "Will you boys hurry up? There are cherries waiting to be eaten!!!!!" I scream at them.
"We are coming." Rick says laughing at me.
"Women." Logan says rolling his eyes.
We reach the beach in time to watch the sun set and make the sky rainbow. Rick and Emily had snuck away a little while ago to how do I put it….have fun. I look back up at the sky and smile. I can't believe everything that has happened to me this year. I mean I am laying on the beach after an art exhibit that featured my work. MY WORK. How crazy is that? I didn't think that I would ever get this chance and my whole family actually came to see what I did. Well aside from Rebecca, but that is a different can of worms. Even crazier I am dating Logan Clifton, the guy who I had proclaimed to hate since my childhood.
"What are you smiling about?" Logan asks as he turns so we are laying facing each other.
"Nothing."
"Nothing? Aw come on Bambi."
"I was just thinking about life."
"Life?"
"Yeah life. You know all the crazy stuff that happened in this one year has got me thinking."
"What about?"
"I don't know. Family."
"Uhhh…family"
"Oh don't be so negative. I mean I always thought my family didn't care all that much about me and look what happened. They came. "
"That is because your family is great."
"Your family is great too Mister."
"Yeah." He says sarcastically. "My parents get divorced because my dad cheats on my mom, and then my mom gets cancer. My parents then get remarried only to have my mother died of said cancer. Resulting in the impregnation of my father's former mistress, who he then marries."
"I never said they were normal. Besides families come in all different shapes and sizes."
"Wow could you be any more of a cheesy Full House cliché?"
"Aw come on Peachey. Life is great. You get a new baby sibling. Maybe even a little brother who you can teach all your best moves to. "
"Yeah. Babies are cute."
"Damn right they are."
"I am surprised to see you to smile about family. I thought you would be a little bit more upset about Rebecca." He says cautiously.
"Yeah well I have decided that maybe she wasn't as perfect as I thought, but I am okay with that. I hope were ever she is she is happy and maybe one day I will get the chance to know her again."
"I hope you get that chance to Pumpkin."
Letting myself get lost in Logan's blue eyes once more I say, "I am glad that I let myself trust you Logan."
“I am glad you let yourself trust me too.”
Fin.
You will always be the most amazing fan I have never met. (:
It had been hours since I closed the letter and put it under my pillow but my heart was stilling beating so fast that it felt like it would jump out at any second. I thought reading that letter would make me feel differently, better. I thought it would tell me something important and I guess it was some good advice, but other than that, it was just a bunch of words. All I got from the letter is that everyone thinks I am a big baby that cannot handle the truth and that I am to naïve to see the bad in people. Every person in my life has said or showed that they felt this way, Baca, Josh, my mom, Logan and even Emily. Am I really that much of a child that nobody feels they can tell me anything? And to make matters worse, I cannot ask anybody about this because then I would have to show them the dumb letter. It is not like I can go to Josh and be like Rebecca left out of the blue. What is your take? He would just think I was crazy. I wonder if Logan knows anything. Would he even tell me if I asked? Probably, but he would have told me if he knew. He knows how much her leaving tortures me even if I never say it.
I woke up the next morning to the scorching sun burning into my back. Uhhh. Why does the sun have to be so bright and hot? I groan aloud and hear someone chuckle. "Not a good morning Ambs?" If I did not like him, so much I am pretty sure I would strangle him.
Angrily I ask, "What do you want Logan?"
He laughs again at me and I try my very hardest to resist the urge to be mean. "Your mom sent me in here to wake you up for our shopping trip.” How can he be so happy this early in the morning?
"Why did she have to volunteer me to go with you?" I say a bit bitterly.
"Ambi Bambi stop being such a sour apple and get dressed." He says a little roughly.
"Yeah I am getting up. Jeez. I hate how happy you are.” I say finally getting off my bed to make way to my closet. I grab a pair of shorts and a Beatles tank top and head towards the bathroom. "Okay I am up and heading towards the bathroom so you can tell my mom." He walks up to me and kisses my forehead before walking out of my room. When I am dressed and ready to shop, I go downstairs and find my mom and Logan talking.
"Morning." My mom says to me handing me a glass of orange juice and a toast. "Okay eat up we have a lot to do today. Let me go grab my purse and we can leave."
I munch on my bread and look at Logan staring outside the window deep in thought. "Logan."
He does not reply for a couple of seconds but then finally looks at me and smiles. "Yes Ambs?"
"Are you okay?" I ask.
He looks at me once more and smiles. "Just Peachey."
I giggle and rub his knee under the table as my mom walks in. Logan gives me a cocky smirk and I roll my eyes at him.
"Okay let’s go kids." My mom says leading us to the car but handing Logan the keys. "Can you drive? I hate the big hill we have to take to get to the mall." Logan grabs the keys and I ride shotgun. The whole trip to the mall my mom has her eyes closed and is lying back comfortably in her seat. I smile at her and turn to Logan who is giving me what can only be described as a naughty smile. He leans in slowly and kisses me full on the lips. When he pulls away, I can tell he is trying his hardest not to laugh at my shocked face that is looking between him and my mom. He is crazy. What if she had woken up? I would get angry but then again he would not be Logan if he took the safe route. Besides life never has a dull moment when I am with Logan.
When we reach the mall, I gently wake my mom up and she hops out of the car clearly extremely excited about going to the mall. "Okay where should we start? Oh actually we can start at Bloomingdales looking for your dress Amber. “She says to me as she begins to march determinedly into the mall. I groan and follow behind her with Logan hot at my tail.
"Ambi Bambi it won't be that bad. You’re a girl shopping should not be such a chore."
"Yeah well I hate shopping for dresses because I hate having to keep changing. I wish I could be like a perfect size so that I never had to try clothes on to make sure they fit around my butt or boobs."
Logan looks at me quizzically but then shrugs his shoulders, presumably deciding he rather not know what I mean. I grab his hand and pull him so he will walk faster. When we both enter the store mom is already running through the dresses. "Oh there you two are. What color do you think she should wear?" She asks Logan completely ignoring me.
"Please act like I don't exist." I mumble sarcastically so only Logan can hear.
"Um... I think Amber looks lovely in... Purple.” Logan says looking at me. I giggle because his cheeks are a little pink. Mom seems to think he looks quite adorable to because she touches his cheek and laughs at him. If Logan looked pink before after mom touched his cheek he was bright red.
Mom starts her search again trying to find dresses in purple. As soon as she is out of ear shot, "Aww Logan.” I say pinching his cheeks.
"Quit it." He says embarrassed and slightly grumpy.
"You looks so cute with your wattle pink cheeks." I say giving him a kiss on the cheeks. The second my lips touch his cheeks a cocky grin appears on his face. I laugh at him and playfully hit his arm for being such a boy.
Grumbling, "Ouch. What was that for?"
I look at his arm to make sure I did not actually hurt him and then say, "For taking my cute embarrassed boyfriend and turning him back into you."
He rolls his eyes at me not really caring and says, "Oh honey bunny no need to hide that you really wanted to kiss me."
"Oh puh-lease your cute but not that cute." I say darkly.
Pointing to his dumb grinning face he says, "Can't undo this smile. Sorry."
I roll my eyes yet again and "So I look good in purple?" I say with a sly smile.
"Uhhh. You’re never going to let me forget this are you?"
"Nope. I wish I had taken a picture so when I tell this story to people they can see how red your cheeks really were."
When we arrive home from the mall, Logan and I go straight upstairs both excessively tired from having to walk around with mom the entire day. Logan said he would meet me in my room later in the night so I just went to take a quick shower before I go to bed. My quick shower however became much longer because as soon as the hot water hit my skin I was so enticed I could not turn off the water. Finally, after pruning up from the hot water I grudgingly turn off the water and get changed into a pair of shorts and a shirt.
I walk out of the bathroom and am not surprised to see Logan sitting on my bed, but what surprises me is that he is holding the letter Baca left me. Looking at Logan's face, I can tell he is upset.
"Ambs, what is this?"
I shrug my shoulders like it is no big deal and hope he will not ruin this for me. "A letter Rebecca left me."
"Ambs did she just send you this?"
"No she left it for me before she left."
He walks up to me pulling me towards the bed to sit down next to him. "Ambi, why are you holding on to this?" He asks softly.
"Logan, she is my sister and this letter is all I have left of her." I state obviously.
"Ambs I know that you miss her and holding onto this letter is important but it is not healthy for you to hold on to this like your waiting for her."
I do not know why but Logan saying that makes me snap. "I know holding on to a letter won’t bring her back, but she said she would come back one day for me.” I say yelling at him.
His blue eyes soften and he holds my hand, "I know what she must have said, but it has been a really long time. I just do not want to see you get your heart broken again waiting for her or worse be disappointed that she was not at perfect as you remember. Ambs sometimes when people leave it is for the best."
"She will comeback for me, I know she will."
Logan wipes away some stray tears. "I hope your right, but promise me you won't go looking for her or snooping around trying to find stuff out about where she is. Not even to Josh or your mom."
I begin to nod my head but then," What do my mom and Josh know Logan?"
"I- Just promise me you will not ask them anything anymore. Your mom and Josh have been through enough Amber."
"LOGAN WHAT DO THEY KNOW?" I scream angry.
"Shh….everyone will hear you.”
"I don't care. Tell me what they know, what you know."
"Ambi. I do not think I should. They obviously didn't tell you for a reason."
"Logan. Please. I am not a little baby." I say with a pleading face.
"I know that."
"Then why does everyone insist on treating me like one?"
"We just want to protect you. I know how much you loved your sister, but she wasn't as perfect as you remember."
"Well yeah. Nobody is perfect."
"What do you remember of Rebecca leaving?"
"Erm. I don't know. It was like one second she was there, all happy and silly, and then the next she was gone. I remember her being really upset about something and having a fight with mom and dad, but that was normal. "
"Did you know when Rebecca left she was pregnant?"
"What? No. She would have told me."
"She was."
"She left because she wanted the baby and the parent's wouldn't let her have it?"
"Yeah basically."
"So they pushed her away?" I say furiously.
"No you didn't let me finish. When Rebecca left, she was pregnant. Did you know she was also a drug addict?" This time I kept my mouth shut just taking in what Logan said. "She left because your parent's wanted her to give up the baby because they didn't think she could raise it. They were afraid that she wouldn't be able to quit the drugs long enough to have the baby and even if she did what would happen to the child. Rebecca was furious when they said they wouldn't help her out. Before you get all mad at your parent's you have to understand that, they wanted a lot more for your sister than what she had gotten. Rebecca didn't want the path they choose for her which is understandable. But anyway, she started to hang out with Jayden towards the end of her senior year. Rebecca was crazy about him. From what your brother and I remember, he was a sketchy person. He used to take Rebecca out and get her totally wasted and just leave her at the doorsteps not even bothering to make sure she made it inside okay. Rebecca ignored that part for some reason. She was so sure that Jayden was the one so when news of the pregnancy came along she was excited. So when your parent's came and burst her bubble she ran. Your parent's went to the police, but they couldn't do anything because Rebecca was 18, an adult. They said it was her choice, the most they could do is get her whereabouts for the family."
"No. No. No. NO. She wasn't an addict. She wasn't like that. You’re lying." I say hitting Logan as he tries to hug me.
"Ambi I wouldn't lie to you and you know it.” Logan pulls me into a warm embrace as I cry. Of all the things that I though Rebecca was a drug addict was never one of them. This wasn't my sister. I mean I knew she drank and stuff but I never thought she had a problem. She was always sane when I was with her. "Sshhh. It's okay. “Logan whispers in my ear softly.
I don't know when exactly I fell asleep that night but when I woke up I was still in Logan's arms. He had no doubt stayed with me the whole night.
"Morning." He whispers sweetly into my ear.
"Mmm. Morning." I say back. He looks at my face, studying me. He is probably thinking I am about to cry some more, but I think I had cried enough last night to last me a lifetime. I didn't even know people cry that much. "I am fine."
"You sure?" He asks looking concerned.
"Yeah. Crying can't change anything." I say.
"Yes, but sometimes crying is just what you need to do to feel better."
"Yeah well I don't feel better. I feel ugly." I croak.
"You are not ugly." He says looking into my eyes.
"You’re my boyfriend Logan. You thinking I am not ugly doesn't count." I say half smiling.
"I would think your beautiful either way." Logan says kissing my forehead. He didn't bring up Baca, which I was grateful for. I think if he had, I might actually start crying again. I just couldn’t wrap my head around this. I mean the Baca I knew was so different then the Rebecca Logan told me about. Baca was carefree, strong, and confident. This Rebecca sounded like she was lost and in pieces.
A little while later Logan left and let me, take a shower. He seemed reluctant to leave, but I convinced him I was okay enough to shower by myself. I was glad because I think I need some time to think or not think. I took a hot numbing shower trying to get lost in the water to not have the B word pop into my head.
I think it is more crushing knowing that I had always idolized my sister and having Logan tell me the truth about her kind of hurt more. If I had known all my life that she had a problem and that was why she left I would have been able to accept it and move on, but not knowing I created this pedestal for her because I thought she was so great. It is like when you’re small and you actually believe in the tooth fairy, then one day someone comes and tells you the tooth fairy doesn't exist. It is like learning that some of the magic of your little life isn't magic at all; just your parent's fooling you into believing there is magic only to crush you later. I never believed in the tooth fairy but I always thought that on my 11th birthday I would get a letter from Hogwarts. The day I didn’t get one, I was completely heartbroken.
After taking a shower and throwing on some clothes, I slowly make my way down to the kitchen. The family and Logan are all sitting around the table. Everyone is laughing and smiling. For a brief second I am frustrated beyond words that they can just sit here all happy and jolly when everything that I thought about my family is completely a mess, but then I remember that all of them have dealt with their issues of Baca besides me. I sit down quietly at the table and drink some of the orange juice that mom puts in front of me. Logan gives my hand a light squeeze.
"Amber honey, show your father how you look in your dress after brunch.” Mom says to me cheerfully. Then she turns to dad and says, “Sweetie she looks so darling in it and Logan was right, purple really does look quite nice on her." Everyone laughs at my mom's excitement.
"Logan? What are you wearing?" Josh asks smirking at Logan.
Before Logan can even answer, though mom cuts in. "Oh he is wearing this very nice suit I found him. Classic black and with a matching tie to Amber's dress. They look so adorable together." And so brunch proceeds with talks about the wedding and plans for the day.
After brunch, I help mom clean up the table a bit. She goes on and on about makeup and jewelry. For once, I am actually happy that my mom keeps talking. Her constant yammering distracts me from thinking about Baca.
When the morning for Logan's dad's wedding came I was extremely nervous, not for myself but for Logan. I had put all my thoughts, emotions, and problems about Rebecca in the back of my head because today is really important for Logan. Veronica had called and checked again to make sure that Logan was coming for what seems like the nth billion time. I felt somewhat bad for her because she was supposed to be getting married today and she was all freaked out about Logan. I had yelled at Logan, making him call her to say he would come and not to worry. She seemed relieved or at least that is what Logan had said.
We reach Logan's old house a couple minutes before the ceremony is about to start. The house is decorated with lights and flowers everywhere. It looks absolutely enchanting. Logan parks the car across the seat and opens my door for me. I smile and take his hand. He playfully nudges me on my side.
"Nervous?" I ask as we walk into the house because Logan's hand is sweating.
"No.” He replies too quickly.
"Really? So then you popped a water balloon in your hand before you held mine." I say giggling.
"Oh sorry." He says letting go of my hand. I laugh as his cheeks turn a slight barely there pink.
"It's okay. So where do you want to sit?"
"The back so if I decide I want to leave we can escape without making a scene."
"Logan, he is your dad. No matter where you leave from your making a scene."
"Fine then where should we sit?" He says grumpily.
"The front on the groom's side."
He groans but pulls lightly pushes me towards the front. "Happy?"
I smile at him and give him a kiss on the cheek. "Don't worry Peachey it will be done quick. I promise."
"Yeah. Want to go make out in my old room later?"
I giggle. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"
He smirks and then leans in close like he is going to say something but nibbles on my ear. I resist the urge to moan and try to push him off lightly. When he pulls back, he is laughing evilly. "You want me."
"I was so going to go with you to your room but now that you did that never mind. I don't want to."
He rolls his eyes at me and says, "Yeah sure you don't." I turn to face forward and decide I am ignoring him but he leans into my ear again this time he says, "You look beautiful."
I smile up at him and say, "You look beautiful too Peachey."
"Right, that is what every guy wants to hear from his girlfriend that he looks beautiful."
Trying my hardest not to laugh I say, "Not my fault you’re feminine." He rolls his eyes at me again and this time he turns to face forward. "I am just kidding. You look very hot."
"I know. I just wanted you to say it."
"You make me regret ever being nice to you sometimes Peachey."
"No you don't. You can't help it." He says smirking like a cocky bastard.
"Whatever. Hey isn't that your grandma?" I say pointing to a old lady wearing a pink suit with a flower hat.
"Yeah. I can't believe she showed up."
"Well it is her son getting married." I point out.
"Yeah but she hasn't talk to dad since the divorce." He says gawking at his grandmother.
"Well maybe she embraced the motto forgive and forget."
Logan shakes his head. “She was madder than me."
I roll my eyes at him and says, "Yeah but she might not be as stubborn as you.” He opens his mouth to respond but then closes it realizing I might be right. "Are you going to go see your dad before the ceremony starts?"
"Nah. He is probably busy." I am about to interject when he continues, "But I will go after, if you come with me."
Give him kiss on the lips, "Of course and then later we can go to your room." I say giving him a naughty smile.
He chuckles and then kisses me cheek saying, "I love you."
"Well of course you do. Hello?! I am awesome.” Making him laugh again.
When the ceremony starts both of us shut up and watch as Mr. Clifton and Veronica exchange vows. Veronica looked absolutely breathe taking in her dress that makes her completely glow and the belly kind of helps too. I hold Logan's hand through the whole ceremony; he squeezes a little tightly when the part about the vows come. All in all the ceremony was a complete fairy tale but I don't say that to Logan because it would just tick him off. "So you want to go see your dad now or later?"
Logan makes a face. "Can we go later? I need a drink right now and after I think I want to visit my old room."
I giggle. Logan grabs a bottle of champagne from behind the bar and two glasses, and leads me to the stairs. We walk through the door of his room and land on his bed. He pops open the bottle and pours us both a glass. He gives me a glass and sits on the bed.
"So babe what now?" Logan says wrapping his hand around me.
"Hmm… I can think of something." I say sitting on his lap and kissing his lips.
"I think I know where you are going with this." He says kissing my neck. I moan wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling his lips back to mine. Logan slowly rubs my back. I moan into his mouth and tug on his dark hair lightly to deepen the kiss. He groans and starts unzipping the side of my dress while I start loosening his tie and unbuttoning his shirt. Logan turns us around so he is on top of me and I wrap my leg around his waist. Logan slowly runs his hand down my leg.
"I love your legs.” Logan says staring into my eyes briefly. I take that time to remove his shirt so I can run my hands down his toned chest. He groans again and bites on my lip gently starting up a whole another round of passion.
Half an hour later after a seriously hot make out session with Logan we both head down the stairs, but only after I fix myself up a little so it doesn't look like I was practically in Logan's pants ten seconds ago. Logan sporting his signature bad boy smirk ran his hands through his hair, put his shirt back on, and was ready to go. I wish I were a boy sometimes just because they have it so easy.
Logan takes my hand and leads me to the backyard where the reception is in full swing. I see Mr. Clifton and Veronica sitting at the main table smiling at each other in a grossly cute way. Logan leads me to our table that is in the very front near the bride and groom's table. When Veronica sees Logan and me, she waves slightly giving us both a smile. My smile seems more genuine then Logan's but I don't really blame him for not being overly thrilled. I guess I would still be a little angry and slightly annoyed.
"Hey I am going to go say hi and whatever. You ready?" Logan asks.
Dropping my fork, I get up.” Yeah." We walk over in silence towards the table.
"Hey dad."
"Logan." Logan's dad says looking slightly watery eyed. "You came."
"Yeah well women can be very persuasive." Logan says looking between me and Veronica.
His dad surprises me by chuckling. It is really strange to actually see him laughing with his son. I mean he isn't what you would call a big goof who laughs with his kid. Honestly he smiles less than even my dad and my dad doesn't smile all that much to begin with unless he is with my mom and she is being well like mom. "She can be a tad over the top at times." Mr. Clifton says looking a Veronica with a smile.
"Well, I just wanted you two to not fight because of me. It is all my fault." Veronica says crying. Logan looks at me unsure of what to do but I don't really know what to say. Mr. Clifton hands her a napkin. "Sorry. I seem to be crying a lot these days. Pregnancy hormones. "Veronica says trying to laugh. I look awkwardly at the dance floor not really sure how to reply. Logan just smiles politely.
“Erm. Amber and I are going to be leaving and we just wanted to say hi before we left."
"Oh. Stay for the cake at least." Logan's dad says.
"I promised Mrs. Thorn I would have Amber back home before it gets too late because she has plans." Logan says.
"Oh alright then. Bye son."
"Bye Logan and thank you for coming. It meant the world to me to have you share this day with me and your father."
"Yeah.” We wave our byes and head back into the house.
"I have plans?" I ask Logan once we are out of earshot.
"Yeah sorry. I get that they are all happy and stuff, but I don't think I could take any more of their love-y faces. "
I shrug my shoulders. "Whatever. I don't really enjoy watching old people make out. It creeps me out slightly."
Logan laughs and leads me to the car.
A week had passed since I learned the truth about Rebecca and I think I had finally come to terms with the truth. I never brought up the Rebecca with my parents or Josh deciding Logan was probably right when he said they didn't need to go through that again.
Today was the night of the art exhibit that featured my painting of Logan and me in our old age. Mrs. Olsen had asked me bring in my portfolio so she could help me decide what I should put in the show. She saw the painting I had made of my dream from the beginning of the year and said she thought it was perfect. My parents, Josh, Logan, and Emily had all agreed to come to see my painting in the exhibit. It was nerve racking but I was excited to have them see my work because nobody aside from Logan had actually ever seen my paintings. Mrs. Olsen had me come in early to the exhibit to set up so I got a chance to see other people's work too, which only added to my nervousness because all the painters in the exhibit seemed like hardcore. Their paintings all seemed to intricate with obscure names like Obtuse, but Mrs. Olsen assured me that my painting was fine and I was just letting the nerves get to me.
At seven, the exhibit opened and a dignified looking man in a black suit talked about these being the works of exceptionally talented artist who were only beginning to blossom into their full potential. He rambled on for a while and then we everyone was free to look around.
"Dang Girl!!!!!!!" Em says as she sees my art. I laugh. "I mean I knew you were good but I never knew you were this good."
"Thanks Em."
"Oh honey, it is absolutely beautiful. What was your inspiration?"
"Thank you mom. It was a dream I had awhile back." I smile at Logan. I never did tell him it was a painting of me and him, but something tells me I am not meant to.
"Must have been some dream. This painting is absolutely amazing and the emotions are so raw."
"Thank you."
"Ambi Bambi this is amazing." Logan whispers in my ear.
"Thanks Peachey." I say.
"Crap Amber this is awesome."
"Hehehe. Thanks bro."
"Amber you’re an artist." My dad says as he looks at my painting. That moment was the highlight of my night. I had never thought I would hear someone call me an artist.
After the show is over, I head towards the car. Josh and Logan are inside checking out some mural of a naked chick that they both thought was awesome. I rolled my eyes at them and said I would wait by the car. While I am waiting, I see a couple sucking face outside the exhibit. The girl has her legs wrapped around the guy and his hand is roaming her body hungrily. Dang, they are really getting into it. If the boys were so keen on seeing practical porn, they should have come out here. When they take a moment to breath, I realize that I know that girl. EMILY.
"EMILY?" I question.
"A-Amber?" Em says looking at me in horror. I can't see who she is making out with but I can tell it is someone she didn’t want me to see her with.
"Em, Have anything you like to share with me?" I ask teasingly looking between her and the guy.
"Erm…I don’t think so."
"Em!!!!!!!!" I moan sadly.
"Nice painting Amber." An all too familiar voice says to me.
"Shut up." Em says to mystery man.
"Relax. It is Amber."
"Rick?" I finally ask.
"Hey Amber." He says turning around to face me.
"You and Emily?! Holy crap." I say.
"Holy crap? That is all you have to say? Holy crap? " Emily says angrily.
"Erm… I know I told you to be nice to him but I never expected you to be this nice.” I say.
"I am making out with the cheater who broke your heart." Emily says looking disappointed in herself. Rick looks guiltily between me and Emily.
"I know. I can see and so can the ENTIRE world." I say.
"I am so going to hell. I am so sorry. I claim to be your best friend and then I am with Icky Ricky.” She looks so sad, I feel bad.
"Emily. Relax. I don't really care. I am in love with Logan. Really you and Rick deciding to play tonsil hockey is none of my business even if it is kind of tacky to make out with someone outside the exit and be shocked when someone sees you."
"I am so seriously sorry. I never meant for you to find out like this."
"Emily, don't worry about it. I am in love with Logan. So who cares if you are dating Icky Ricky?"
"Thanks." Rick says sarcastically.
"Your welcome." I giggle. "I just can’t believe your mystery man is Rick. I mean you hate him or hated him"
"My mystery man?" Emily says.
"Oh well I saw you holding someone's hand awhile back so I called him your mystery man.”
"You knew I was dating someone and you didn't say anything?"
"I thought you just wanted some privacy. Besides secret dating someone can be very amusing." I say remembering my make out lust filled make out session with Logan. It always seemed more fun because it was like a double adrenaline rush of passion and the thrill of no getting caught.
"I never told you cause I thought you would get mad and because you’re always busy with Logan so I feel out of place."
"Out of place? Logan, you, me and Josh used to spend loads of time together at my house."
"Yeah but now you guys are a couple, so it is Logan and Amber, Josh with whatever whore he happens to be with at the time and me.” Until Emily had said it, I hadn't really noticed what a crap best friend I had been to her. I can't even remember the last time it was just me and her. I never thought I would be one of those girls who leaves all her friends behind for some guy. Gosh, I suck.
"I am sorry for not being a good friend to you Em." I say running up to her and giving he a hug. "God I suck. I blame Logan for all this. Stupid boy."
"Blame me for what?” Logan says showing up outside.
"Making me ignore Emily." I say angrily at him.
"And how exactly is that my fault Ambs?"
"You Mister have very persuasive lips." I say.
"Not my fault I am irresistible." Logan says cockily.
"Somehow I find it easier to resist you." I say at Logan teasingly.
"So want to go get a chocolate milkshake with a cherry on top guys?" Emily says laughing at me and Logan.
"I do love cherries!!!!!!!" I scream and grab Emily's hand pulling her towards the car. We wait for a boys to walk to us in there painstakingly slow pace, but the cherry buzz kind of gets the better of me. "Will you boys hurry up? There are cherries waiting to be eaten!!!!!" I scream at them.
"We are coming." Rick says laughing at me.
"Women." Logan says rolling his eyes.
We reach the beach in time to watch the sun set and make the sky rainbow. Rick and Emily had snuck away a little while ago to how do I put it….have fun. I look back up at the sky and smile. I can't believe everything that has happened to me this year. I mean I am laying on the beach after an art exhibit that featured my work. MY WORK. How crazy is that? I didn't think that I would ever get this chance and my whole family actually came to see what I did. Well aside from Rebecca, but that is a different can of worms. Even crazier I am dating Logan Clifton, the guy who I had proclaimed to hate since my childhood.
"What are you smiling about?" Logan asks as he turns so we are laying facing each other.
"Nothing."
"Nothing? Aw come on Bambi."
"I was just thinking about life."
"Life?"
"Yeah life. You know all the crazy stuff that happened in this one year has got me thinking."
"What about?"
"I don't know. Family."
"Uhhh…family"
"Oh don't be so negative. I mean I always thought my family didn't care all that much about me and look what happened. They came. "
"That is because your family is great."
"Your family is great too Mister."
"Yeah." He says sarcastically. "My parents get divorced because my dad cheats on my mom, and then my mom gets cancer. My parents then get remarried only to have my mother died of said cancer. Resulting in the impregnation of my father's former mistress, who he then marries."
"I never said they were normal. Besides families come in all different shapes and sizes."
"Wow could you be any more of a cheesy Full House cliché?"
"Aw come on Peachey. Life is great. You get a new baby sibling. Maybe even a little brother who you can teach all your best moves to. "
"Yeah. Babies are cute."
"Damn right they are."
"I am surprised to see you to smile about family. I thought you would be a little bit more upset about Rebecca." He says cautiously.
"Yeah well I have decided that maybe she wasn't as perfect as I thought, but I am okay with that. I hope were ever she is she is happy and maybe one day I will get the chance to know her again."
"I hope you get that chance to Pumpkin."
Letting myself get lost in Logan's blue eyes once more I say, "I am glad that I let myself trust you Logan."
“I am glad you let yourself trust me too.”
Fin.
You will always be the most amazing fan I have never met. (: