Chapter 15

hi. I know. I know. I know. I took forever and ten years and you hate me and blah blah blah. BUT I made it long. 9 word pages!

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Half-dazed I walked to my locker and prayed that my locker for once in its life be nice to me. I could feel Logan's gaze on me as I attempted to put in my code once more and it was not helping my red, flushed skin pale. I attempted once more and then cursed at my lock. I wish it would turn into a frog like in that one Halloween Town movie. I stand there fuming at my lock and Logan. He has not right to make me feel this way. He is a sluty boy who can't keep it in his pants, but somehow he manages to make my stomach flip and my skin flush every time I am near him. I hate him with every fiber in my being. Uhhh. He is dead to me. It is official. I rather take an F in calculus than leave my fate to Logan, who is sure to abuse his powers as my tutor in some majorly inappropriate ways might I add.

"Amber?" Great just what I need Rick.

"What do you want?"

"oh sorry...umm....never mind." Good. At least someone can take a hint. No, I should be nice. It is not his fault Logan finds pleasure in my discomfort.

"No wait Rick. Sorry, I am just annoyed right now. I didn't mean to snap at you."

"Well if it's a bad day than maybe I will talk to you later."

"No its fine. What's up?" I see him standing there nervously biting his lip off and looking uncomfortable. He is wearing his Harry Potter shirt that says, "Dumbledore dies on page 596. (I just saved you 4 hours and $30)" I smile. I have the same one because we bought it together. God. I miss Rick. Not the jerk one who slept with my best friend but the sweet boy who used to make me laugh. In all honesty, I am over the whole him sleeping with my best friend thing. I thought I was not, but I am. I cannot be mad at him for not liking me. I am not going to be petty. So he didn't like me as much as I liked him. Oh well. I am building a bridge and getting over it.

"I just wanted to apologize. I never meant to hurt you. I was stupid and Kayla told me this story about how you had a crush on Logan and that you where using me to make him jealous. I knew it was crazy, but you guys where always together and all the girls love Logan."

"Well that does sound like Kayla, but honestly me and Logan? He is a slut and I do NOT like him. Why does everyone just assume that I like him because he is my brother's best friend and it is some crazy forbidden love story that ends with us all mushy and gross. "

"Because he likes you."

"He does not. Logan doesn't like anyone. He just likes getting laid."

"No Amber seriously he likes you. He is always picking on you and making you mad and crazy because he likes you."

"Okay you're delusional." I say laughing and nudging him playfully. Loser Kid. I can't believe he actually thought Logan liked me. Logan is hot, funny, and weirdly charming for a person who thinks girls are a piece of *ss, him liking someone like me is just crazy. I am not totally gorgeous, I don't know how to just not care, and I can't say no to people. Logan is the type of guy who ends up with a girl who is totally gorgeous and perfect, but you can't her cause she is so freaking nice.

"SO does this mean I am forgiven?"

"Hmmm...I don't know. I liked you an awful lot and then you had to go and ruin it by being stupid." I say trying to keep my face composed. He looks sad, but totally understanding. "Rick?"

"Yeah."

"I am just kidding. Of course your forgiven. You know I can't stay mad at people."

"You were always way to nice and forgiving, not that I mind."

"Of course not. Booger brain."

"Whatever. So what are you doing this weekend? We should hang out. Me, you, and Emily can go to Six Flags."

"Oh sure, but you are going to have to get Emily to forgive you first." He looked even more scared and nervous then when he was asking for me to forgive him. Got to love my best friend.

"Amber!!!! Ick. " Ha-ha. She has some great timing.

"Hey Em." I say sweetly. Rick or Ick as she had named him looks uncomfortable.

"What is icky doing here?"

"Be nice. He was just wondering if we wanted to go to Six Flags with him."

"NO WAY I AM GOING ANY WHERE WITH HIM. HE IS THE BIGGEST JERK-FACE EVER."

"Em. BE NICE and inside voice."

"Fine then, no way am I going anywhere with him. He is the biggest jerk-face ever."

"Please I forgave him surely you can too."

"Well your too nice."

"Please Emily. I am really sorry about what I did to Amber and I know I am a jerk-face, but please."

"Fine I will come, but I will not be happy about it until after we see the tiger swim." Emily says with a huge grin. I smile. Rick looks beyond happy. Ha-ha.

"Great." I say. Rick looks speechless.

When the bell finally rings, I am beyond excited to get out of that prison and be home. I walk to where the car is and see it is missing instead I see Logan's Black jeep. Great. Just what I need more time alone with Logan. I stand by the car debating whether I should walk home.

"Ambs hop in." I stare at him angrily before sighing and hopping in. I don't say anything or even look at him. I am not going to let him have some crazy power over me. We are half way home and I am pretty proud of myself I haven't spoken or looked at Logan. Go me. "Are you really that angry about the kiss or are you upset because you liked it more than you should have?" I can hear the smile his face has on it. I don't respond. He is not getting me to talk to him. "I guess this means you are upset that you liked the kiss."

"I DID NOT. THAT WAS NOT THAT GOOD OF A KISS." I say angrily. I clap my hands to my mouth. He got me to say something. Apple tart.

"Well I thought it was amazing, but that is probably cause I am such a great kisser." I hate how cocky he is.

"Oh p-lease. Seriously, how do you have such an insanely large ego? Your head is getting so big it's about to pop. "

"Whatever Ambs. You like me and that's why your angry because that kiss was amazing and you just don't want to admit it."

"Have you ever thought maybe your projecting and you're the one who likes me but your too stupid to notice. " He just stares at me as if I spoke in Latin. As he gapes at me, I decide I might as well make my escape. I jump out of the car and go straight to the kitchen to grab a snack, which is a cold burrito. I take a bite. Okay never mind cold burritos don't taste good. I walk over to the microwave and heat it. I can't believe Rick thought Logan liked me. Hell I can't believe I let Logan kiss me. I stand at the microwave waiting for the burrito to warm when I feel a strong warm hand firmly grasp me around the waist. LOGAN. I know its Logan because one he is the only one home besides me and two because I can feel my whole entire body tingling under his touch. Sometimes I wonder how he can do that, but I think informing him about my body tingling would just turn into one of his twisted little stories about how I am secretly in love with him. In reality, I think he is the one with some weird obsession with girls cause he is always the one to attack first. I feel his cool breath along my jaw line and his hands tightening around me. His lips are so close to my skin. Uhhh. He drives me crazy, but I know that if I ever had a chance with him I would regret not taking it.

"Amber." He whispers into my ear making me shiver. This time I take a deep breath and try to untangle myself from his grasp. I will not kiss him twice in one day and be his conquest I chant to myself. I am not going to be his little f*ck buddy, who he will just forget. His lips are on my neck by this time. You would think all my protesting would be a turn off, but apparently not. He starts sucking on my neck and I bite on my lips to stop the moan that threatens to give away how much I actually love his skin touching mine.

"L-L-Logan." I whisper pathetically. He laughs and starts pulling me towards the counter. I follow him not really realizing what I am doing. When we reach the counter he picks me up, sets me on top of it, and continues sucking my neck. Gosh if this weren't so wrong, I would never want him to stop. Not able to take it anymore I pull his soft lips to mine. He stops for a second seeming totally shocked, but he should be, I am. I continue to kiss him until he responds. His tongue slowly traces my bottom lip asking for entrance. I open my mouth granting him access. His tongue is soft and taste chocolate sweet. I feel the familiar tingling sensation as his hands are under my shirt holding my tightly to him. The feeling is indescribable, but possibly the most amazing feeling in the world. I wrap my legs around his waist and pull him closer to me trying to make this moment last. I run my nails up his back. He moans into my mouth. His hands wrap around my waist and he starts to carry me to the stairs. We make our way up the stairs not letting go of each other. I know I should stop him and tell him this is wrong and I don't want to do this, but I can't. I need him and want him and it scares the shit out of me. I also know this is just something that probably means nothing to him, but what if it's not. Guys like Logan just loves the chase, but what if he does like me? What if Rick was right? What if I am making a huge mistake? What if by saying no I make a bigger mistake? Maybe I need to stop thinking. Boys always say girls over analyze things and I think we do, for the most part. When we reach my room he leads me straight to the bed. I lay under him and feel his hot, toned body pressed against mine. My hands find there way under his shirt and I pull it off of him. I can feel him hard against my thigh. I am not going to try to lie and say I didn't enjoy the feeling, but before you get overly horny I enjoyed it because for once he wanted me. His body was showing how badly he wanted me. I can't help but smirk a little. Logan stops kissing me frantically and looks into my eyes. I try to somehow avoid his gaze, but I can't. He won't let me move. The little jerk. "What?" I say breathlessly.

"I- I can't do this. I thought I could, but I can't. " He said equally breathless. His sounded super sexy while my breathless voice makes me sound like a donkey being murdered. Why am I thinking about how sexy he sounds when he is rejecting me?

"What?!" I couldn't control the shock in my own voice. He

"I just can't. Ambs, your gorgeous and hot and funny and annoyingly nice but your also Josh's little sister. He's my best friend and I can't do this to him. This is a major violation of the bro-code. He is like a brother to me, I can't hurt him." He says rolling off me.

"Oh." Cause hurting me is not an issue cause I totally don't like him. Hehehe.....NOT.

"Ambs, I didn't mean you were not important."

"Hmm? I- it doesn't matter." I say turning to face the bookshelf in my room.

"Really? Then why does your face look like that?" Okay note to self: learn to control facial expressions or wear a bag over head at all times. I feel my cheeks reddening with every word he says. Damn him. Even when he is rejecting me he can make me blush.

"My face is not like that."

"Yes it is."

"Stop accusing my face of looking like that. It didn't do anything."

"It is not accusing if your face shows it and it does matter. Amby your important, but so is my friendship with Josh, which means I think we should just stick to being friends."

"Well what if... for the sake of argument of course... that I didn't want to be your friend, what if ....I wanted to be more that friends." I say.

"Relax Amby. I know you love me."

"Oh shut up. I said for the sake of argument. Stop letting that big head of yours damage your hearing."

"Well I would have to regretfully decline." He says with a smirk on his face. Fine if he wants to be an *ss than let the games begin. I walk into my closet leaving the door wide open. I slowly remove my cloths one at a time letting him see my bare skin. Good thing the lighting in this place sucks otherwise he would notice how red my cheeks were. When I finally am in my black lacey bra and panties I turn around in my closet 'trying' to 'find' something to wear. I bend down grabbing a nightdress thingy. I turn back around so my back is facing him and drop my bra to the ground picking up the dress and putting it on. Then I turn around and walk back into the room Logan's face shows hunger as does his noticeable erection.

"Logan." I say waving my hand in front of his face until he notices my face instead of my boobs.

"Hmm?" I laugh until he pulls me close to him and I can feel his lips trailing along my neck. Gulp. "Feeling naughty are we?" He whispers huskily into my ear.

"Logan are you this nice to all your friends or just me?" I say sweetly making him let go of me.

"Fine deny your undying lust for me."

"Okay." I say rolling my eyes at him.

"Crossie, how about I help you with some calculus to show you what a good friend I can be."

"Okay."

It about 10 o'clock and I am exhausted. I spent the larger part of the afternoon locked up in my room with Logan and no we didn't do anything but study. Contrary to popular belief, I do have some self-control in the presence of Logan Clifton.

Logan is surprisingly a very good teacher by the end of the night I actually understood what he was saying.

"Thanks for the help Logan."

"You are welcome."

"So you're really serious about this us being only friends thing."

"Sad that you can't make out with me?"

"No just wondering."

"Yeah if Josh found out that we well...yeah. I love him like a brother."

"Even if it is kind of insulting I think it's sweet that you care about my brother."

"Insulting?"

"Well you did just choose josh over making out with me."

"Ha-ha. Yeah, but I still get to talk to you, which is better than not even being able to be in the same room as you if Josh found out." That is possibly the sweetest thing I have ever heard.

"I know. What would you do without me?"

"Your more amusing that you realize."

"Sure I am." I say.

"You are, you just don't know it."

"Okay Mister whatever you say."

"You are." He says as I jump off the bed and head towards the door. I am starving.

When we reach downstairs I see Adam and Josh sitting on the couch watching the game. I crash between Josh and Adam.

"Hi."

"Hey. Where have you been locked up?" Josh asks while Adams hand absentmindedly runs up and down my bare arm leaving goose bumps.

"Locked up in my room with Logan." Before I can even explain Josh launches at Logan who is sitting in his chair drinking a cold beer totally oblivious. Even Adam's hand freezes.

"Josh...JOSH nothing happened." I say as I try to get Josh to stop punching Logan.

"Really so then why was this dickhead in your room?" He says hitting Logan right in the face. Adam by this time had gotten Josh away for Logan. I run into the kitchen and grab a bag of frozen peas. Okay starting to get what Logan was talking about. I run to Logan who is sitting on the couch with a bloody nose and a black eye on its way. Okay eww. Nose Blood. Gross much. I rip the bottom of my dress and give the cloth to Logan to blot his nose with. "Amber get away from him."

"SHUT THE FUDGE CRACKERS UP. He was helping me with some calculus cause I was failing. You idiot." I notice Adam looks a little relieved to by this information.

"Oh. I thought."

"Yeah. I know. Honestly does my face look like I just slept with Logan?" He looks at me for a minute.

"No." He mumbles. Jeez he is sweetly annoying. God I would be blushing like an idiot and would not be standing near Logan. Afterall he would have seen me naked.

I walk back over to Logan. He looks awful. "Logan? Logan are you okay? I am really sorry." I mumble.

"I'm fine Ambs." He says smiling and placing his hand on my cheek and wiping away a few loose tears on my cheek. I didn't even realize I was crying. Why would I be crying? It's just Logan being beat up by Josh. It's nothing new.

"Bro I am sorry. I didn't realize. I am an idiot." Josh says handing Logan a beer and the TV remote.

"Nah its cool." He says taking the beer and remote. They both smile and do that boy fist thing.

"Boys." I say rolling my eyes. If this was two chicks they would probably never talk to each other and whatever, but boys just bring each other a beer and hand over the remote and suddenly everything is cool. Ha-ha. Got to love them. I sit down next to Logan as Adam and Josh take their seats on the couch.

"What the freak is this?" Josh asks.

"Whale Wars." I say. Man I love this show. Me and Logan sat here one summer night and watched an entire season on demand cause we were bored out of our minds and there was nothing on TV.

"What happened to the game?" Josh and Adam ask.

"This is cooler. Don't change it ."

"Don't worry I'm not, I love this show." Logan says waving the remote in his hand and smiling at me. I wonder if he remembers that summer night. It was a million degrees outside and we sat around eating ice scream and pizza while Josh was at summer camp for the week. By the end of the night I think we got Josh and Adam addicted to this show. Animal Planet is so cool. I know, I am a geeky for admitting it, but whatever. Logan like it too, so ha.

I stay up watching the Whale Wars after Josh goes up to his room to sleep and Adam goes home. Looking at the clock I see its almost one in the morning.

"Going to sleep." Logan says as I get up, stealing his blanket cause its freezing cold.

"Yup."

"Night Ambs." He says getting up and giving me a hug. This is weird. His hug was actually a hug not one of those hugs he gives me before he does something dirty but just a hug.

"Night Logan." I say.

"What?"

"It is just a little weird to have you hug me but not even try to grope me."

"Miss my groping do you?"

"In your dreams slut."

"Hey missy I haven't slept with anyone. "

"Anyone YET. Your car will be mine. " I say as I walk up the stairs wrapped in Logan scent. Mm. The boy smells amazing. Its sweet but manly. When I reach my bed I collapse onto it pushing all my books off in the process. Ah. Whatever. I am sleepy. "Hey." I say when I feel someone pulling me a little while later.

"Ambs...give me the blanket."

"mmm...go away." I mumble as Logan tries to unwrap me from the blanket.

"please. Seriously, it's freezing." Uh. Will he shut up its like two in the morning. "fine scoot over." I move myself a little bit so Logan has space to sleep.

"jerk-face." I mumble making him laugh. He couldn't just go to the guest room and take a blanket.

"love you too sweetheart." Logan replies sarcastically. Despite his sarcasm I like the sound of that. I smile and go to sleep with Logan's arms around me keeping me warm.

When I wake up the next morning I am alone, but still have Logan's blanket wrapped around me. I notice that my purple blanket however is missing. I get dressed in a pair of jeans and a white tank top that shows of my boobs a little bit too much. My mom bought it for me and all my clothes are in the laundry.

I run down the stairs and see Josh and Logan sitting on the counter stools.

"Good morning." I say.

"Morning." They both reply.

"Hey Amber you got to catch a ride home with Logan again today. I am going to Jennifer's." He says waggling his eyebrows at Logan.

"Eww. Too much information. Why can't you teach me how to drive so I don't have to keep hitching rides from people?"

"aww...Ambs. I am just 'people'." Logan says making a sad face, which make me feel kind of guilty because he has a black eye from my brother because he was helping me study.

"no, but the point is I need to learn."

"fine." Josh says and then turns to Logan and plays a game of rock-paper-scissors. "yes."

"Ambs when are you free to learn?"

"what?" I say. Totally confused because I think my brother just rock-papered-scissored his way out of teaching me to drive. Booger.

"when are you free?"

"erm...whenever." I say with a gulp. Me and Logan in a car together with me driving and him watching me. This is sure to be a recipe for disaster.

"Don't worry Ambs. I won't let you die." Logan says as Josh laughs. This is so not funny.

"hey let's get a move on it. We are picking up Jen." Great. I walk out and see Logan hop into his car and Josh into his. Hmm. "Hurry up Amber." I give Josh the finger and then run to Logan's car. No way am I sitting in a car that has my brother and Jennifer making out.

"hi." I say as I ride shotgun.

"hello." He says and then starts driving. "I knew you loved me." He says with a sexy smirk that has me staring at his lips. I blush as I realize I am totally ogling over his lips.

"...mm." Was my genius response. Half way to school we stop at the light and I feel Logan gaze on my face. Crap. Why does he always have to look at me. I feel my cheeks turning red and hear him chuckle. Apple tart. I hate him. He just keeps looking. "WHAT?"

"nothing. Your just turning red."

"that's cause you keep looking at me."

"ha-ha. I know. I kind of like making you blush. You look cute when you do."

"Cause red blotches all over my face are totally adorable." I say sarcastically.

"Well you never blush so it's interesting to watch."

"I always blush." Has he met me.

"No. You only blush when I look at you."

"No. I don't blush only for you." I say turning redder.

"Yes, you do. Next time pay attention." He says seriously while cutting of the engine. I look around in surprise, we are at school. Do I really only blush when I am around him? I walk away from Logan as he and my brother walk towards Rick and David.

"hey Amber." Emily says to me as she meets me by Logan's car.

"hi Em. What's up?" Emily wasn't her bubbly self. Her eyes were red and puffy like she had cried.

"Nothing."

"really?"

"yeah."

"okay fine." I walk away and go to my locker. I grab some books and close my locker. I decide to just stand there for a while knowing Emily will come soon enough. She just loves being dramatic.

"hmmmm....hmmmm." Told you so. Finally she took like 20 minutes to get here. I was about to fall asleep.

"are you going to answer honestly this time?"

"yup."

"what's wrong Em?"

"Me and David broke up."

"I'm sorry." I say giving her a hug. She has tears coming down her cheek.

"yeah me too." Logan says getting in on the hug. This time he groped me and Emily. We both laugh at him with his goofy grin. He looks high.

"hey Emily."

"hi Josh."

"sorry." He says and then pulls her into a hug. Okay weird.

"Are you boys high?"

"noooooooooo." They both say smiling at each other like they are in the fifth grade and did something naughty.

"ha-ha...then why do you both have chocolate smiles." Emily says laughing. Special brownies.

"we do." Okay they look cute and totally innocent.

"Boys." I say rolling my eyes at them.

"Amby why do you always roll your eyes at me?" Logan asks making a puppy dogface.

"cause your silly."

"am not."

"are too."

"am not."

"okay fine. How about I make it up to you?"

"okay."

"here...I will let you carry my books."

"really."

"yup."

"okay!" Idiot.

We walk to my first class. Logan walks me in the classroom to my seat.

"Logan books."

"Amber?"

"yes Mrs. Johnson."

"please tell your boyfriend to leave. The bell has rung."

"He is not my boyfriend. Logan books."

"Not without a kiss first honey." Logan says then turns to Mrs. Johnson. " Sorry Mrs. Johnson. I do have to say you look lovely today. How is your dog, Jackson?"

"Oh Logan. Hello dear. Jackson is great." She says blushing. "Logan you must be leaving soon. Amber give him the kiss and he will leave. Right Logan?"

"Of course." Logan says to Mrs. Johnson. How does he do that. "Come on Amby sweetie one kiss." He pulls me into a passionate kiss. Before I can even get to words out he lets go of me and walks out of the classroom. I stand there totally dazzled.

"Miss Thorn please take your seat." I shake my head and sit down in my seat. When I sit down I notice people staring at me. Okay awkward.

"psst... pssssst" Some random chick says.

"yes?"

"are you Logan Clifton's girlfriend? Do you know he is like the number one hottie at this school?" I roll my eyes at her and just look away. I notice someone staring at me and then realize it's Adam. He looks sad. Dang it. I suck.

When calculus ends I walk out quickly trying to avoid Adam. His sad face is not making me feel less guilty. I make my way out of Calculus to see Logan standing by the door. Although Adam being sad sucks, I do love having someone carry my books for me.

"heeeeeeeey Ambs. How was calculus? Did my tutoring help?" I kind of love Logan when he is totally baked. He looks so happy and goofy, but as always totally hot.

"yeah, it was great." I say trying to avoid him putting his arm around me in front of Adam. As we walk to English I see Emily and my brother. From the looks of it I can see Emily got my brother to be her slave as well. Moments like this remind me why me and Emily are best friends. Ha-ha. "hi Em." I say as we pass her she smiles at me. I can see that she is still super sad about the whole David and her breaking up, but Josh looks like he is helping to keep her mind off of him. Gross. That sounds dirty. He is just making her laugh wearing a similar facial expression as Logan. Lunchtime needs to get here already so I can talk to that girl.

When lunchtime finally happens Logan and Josh's smiley faces are gone. Guess the special brownies wore out. What a pooper. I walk to Emily and see her staring at David.

"Em stop looking at him."

"I can't help it. He is just so uhhh."

"What happened? You guys where all gross and cute and then it's over?"

"yeah well David doesn't like my talking to a bunch of guys all day."

"what?"

"apparently I was talking to your brother and to Rick and to Logan and to Taylor and to Cody. He thinks I am cheating on him or some crap like that."

"He does realize that they are just friend, right?"

"apparently not."

"well then he is stupid."

"yeah...well then today he was coming to talk to me and he saw Josh holding my books."

"So you got someone to hold your books for you? I got Logan to do that for me too."

"yeah but you like Logan so it doesn't matter."

"WHAT? I DO NOT."

"yes you do." She says wiping tears off her face.

"AMBER...EMILY?" Josh and Logan say at the same time. I look and Em and her face looks nervous.

"yeah." I say sweetly. Logan gives me a don't play cute and innocent face and my brother just glares.

"what?" Emily says. Someone is a little irritated.

"you girls are in trouble big time?" Josh says angrily.

"yeah. You guys made us carry your books around like pansies. Do we look like whipped little girls to you? " Logan says. I crack a smile about to say something but Logan just glares at me. Angry Logan is hot. Ambs control the hormones would you. I wipe the smile off my face and pray that I don't blush because all I can see is Logan's hot lips making an extremely cute pout. He continues to look at me and then makes a sly smirk before regaining composure. Okay maybe he was right. I might actually only blush when he looks at me. I am not a totally genius but I am pretty sure that's what people do when they like someone. That's what happened to Bella and Ron and Hermione. Crap. On the bright-side we are just friends, which means he won't kiss me and so I don't actually have to freak that I might actually like him. Then again he kissed me in the morning and we are suppose to be just friends, but he was on the brownies so it could have not counted. I hate this. It's so confusing . Why can't he just pick a side and stick with it. Half the time he is all lets make out and the other half he is like no this bad. Bone head.

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