Chapter 12

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"Fine. Go out with the dumb shit. What do I care? I can have any girl I like and they wouldn't be scared to say yes." With that, he storms out of my room. I stand there looking at his ghost. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?! I don't know if I am shocked, hurt, or angry. He is a butthead. Stupid jerk first he kisses me and then tries to basically do it with me and then he tells me I am just a stupid sixteen-year-old chicken, who means nothing. I am never ever EVER going to forgive him. Uhhh. I walk over to my bed and hide in my blankets. I feel tears running down my face. I know it's stupid to be crying over Logan of all people but I can't help it. Somehow when he said that it felt worse because I don't know it was like he knew me or something. I feel stupid more than anything because I know if I hadn't of thought of Adam and just Logan have his way I would probably not be a virgin and somehow that didn't seem so bad at the time at least.

-Next Morning-

I wake up the next morning with sore eyes. I had fell asleep at around two in the morning after crying for 2 hours. I didn't go downstairs so I have no idea what happened. I get up out of bed, walk over to my bathroom, and see I look just as bad as I feel. I have red blotches on my face and major bags under my eyes. Sighing I strip and hop into the shower letting the heat of the shower comfort me. After 30 minutes, I turn off the water realizing I should probably find Emily and make sure she is alive.

When I run downstairs, I see Josh and Emily on the couch with people randomly sitting on either side of them. The sight of the two of them like that makes me laugh no matter how shitty I feel. Quickly running back up to my room, I grab my camera. Might as well have fun with this. Running back down I see they have shifted and now Emily's head is resting on Josh's shoulder and they both have smiles on their faces. Ha-ha.

Taking the lid of my camera, I take a million pictures until they both groan from the flash of the camera.

"What the f*ck?" Josh groans. "Jeez Amber what are you doing?"

"Sorry I was just taking pictures so I would never forget this moment." Josh looks confused until he realizes Emily is the one with her head on his shoulder.

"AHHHH....GROSS!" Emily screams. So much for their new friendship. "Get away from me."

"Hey you're the one resting your head on MY shoulder."

"Oh shut up. I am the one who was resting my head on slut, who probably has a disease."

"You are lucky someone as hot as me even let you come to this party."

"GUYS! Shut up my head is starting to hurt."

"Sorry Amber. Some people, Josh, just don't know when to shut up and be quiet" She says glaring at Josh and following me into the kitchen. "So where were you last night? You went up to change and then you never came down." Not sure, how to answer I just walk to the cabinet and get out a box of coco pebbles. "Well? Where you doing the dirty with Adam?"

"No. He left after you screamed for me when we where swimming."

"Oh. Sorry about that. I was a little tipsy." she said with an apologetic smile.

"I noticed, but its okay. I went to sleep because I was tired. I figured Josh could look out for you. You guys where getting along great last night." I say laughing.

"Eww...well you where wrong. Never leave me alone with your parasite of a brother."

"Why? The pictures I have seemed to show you guys liking each other."

"Yeah well pictures lie." She says grumpily.

-Night of date with Adam-

The rest of the day consisted of my cleaning after Emily made it home. Josh had said he had a major headache and went to sleep leaving me with a huge house to clean. I worked most of the day. Logan never came over, thankfully, because he was 'busy' with stuff at home. You are probably wondering why I know that. Well the truth is I asked Josh and yes I realize I seem pathetic.

After cleaning for forever and ten years, I make my way up to my too pink room. Dang people have no respect for anyone's house. I spent the last hour of my cleaning trying to get a questionable looking red-ish stain of the carpet. I am amazed I don't have some major guns for all the scrubbing I did. Exhausted I sit on my bed and stare at the ceiling. My date with Adam isn't until later and I still have no idea what we are doing but I told Emily that I would text her as soon as I found out. I don't intend on getting raped.

After looking at my boring ceiling for a while, I decide to go in my closet and paint. I grab some blue and black paint and let my thoughts drift as I paint lines. I work for hours and when I am finally done with the picture, I want to cry. It's a picture of Logan's eyes. Yes the guy who told me I was a scaredy cat and that he could screw any girl he liked. In all honesty, the picture itself is amazing. I got his eyes perfect. The right color and everything. I wish I could just take this to school and tell Mrs. James to put it in the Art Gallery she had tried to persuade me to enter into, but I can't and won't. Finally looking away from my painting I notice the time. Crap. Its 15 minutes to seven. Crap I am going to be beyond late for my first official date with Adam.

Running to the bathroom, I rinse my hands so the paint comes off of it and run back into my closet. I should have planned what I was going to where, but oh well. I grab a pair of black shorts and a purple top with black flower designs on it. I throw them on and grab a pair of flip-flops. Back in my bathroom, I straighten my hair quickly and put on some lip-gloss. No way is there enough time for make-up. I look at the clock and Adam will be here in like a couple of minutes.

"AMBER!" Josh screams. Never mind the couple of minutes. "ADAM IS HERE." I run down the stairs, but slow down as I reach the last few. I see Adam at the door waiting for me and I give him a smile. I walk over to the living room really quickly to say by to my brother who is being blocked by some chick he is making out with. Rolling my eyes.

"Josh I am going." When he breaks away from the girl I see its Logan not Josh. "Oh... um...I thought you were Josh."

"Yeah well whatever. I will tell him you left." He says not even looking at me. I feel my eyes' watering as Logan grasps the girl by her neck and starts making out with her again. Well whatever. It isn't like I liked him or anything. Really, this is what I wanted besides I have a boyfriend waiting for me.

Does anybody else find it odd that I have a boyfriend, but I have never even been out on a date with him? I do. This is crazy. I should never have said yes to Adam. I should have stuck with my antisocial-ness. I bet loners stay out of mucky situations like this. Okay now I just sound emo. [a/n: no offense (: and I realize saying that makes it offensive so sorry times a million...so are you guys liking it? Because I am not so much. I miss happy Logan, don't you?...okay shutting the pie hole now] Okay new rule Amber no more I should not date Adam crap. He is gorgeous, sweet and an incredibly good kisser, which is always a plus.

Making my way back to Adam I start to get a little excited. My gorgeous 'boyfriend' and me are going on a date.

"hey. I thought you might have changed your mind." I smile not really wanting to respond to that statement.

"erm..." I say grabbing a cardigan and opening the door. We walk quietly to the car and Adam opens the door for me. How sweet.

"Amber?"

"yes?"

"are you sure you want to do this?"

"this?"

"I mean the whole relationship thing."

"oh.. erm...yeah. Why not?" I can think of a few reasons like I don't know you and I DON'T KNOW YOU.

"look I don't want you to think just cause I asked you, you have to say yes." Wow. Okay. I am seriously stupid. How can I not want this?

"Adam. It's not that I don't want this. I just think this is going way too fast. I just met you. I don't even know your middle name." I say in a rush not looking at Adam so I can avoid the guilt.

Adam is super quiet. I continue to avoid eye contact. I hear Adam turn and then I feel his hand at my chin trying to get me to look at him. Sighing I look up and meet his gaze. He seems calm not annoyed or angry or even sad.

"Amber. You know that it's okay right. That you don't want to be my girlfriend. I get it. I am not an a$$, I really do get it. You want things to go slower."

"I kind of figured you weren't an butt....Adam, Thank you." I say letting a out a sigh of relief.

"does this mean that I can't kiss you?"

I start to say, "well..." but never really get a chance to finish because as soon as I crack a smile Adam's soft lips are on mine. I tangle my fingers into his hair and he mirrors my actions. After an immeasurable amount of time we finally break apart. "so are you going to take me on this date or are you keeping me captive in your car forever?" Not that I really mind at the moment.

We finally reach our destination, the beach. Well it's a good thing I have shorts on. Talk about dumb luck. I start walking with Adam and he brings out a blanket and lays it on the ground. Aww. We are having a picnic. We sit on the beach looking at the sunset into the ocean eating chicken salad. Okay so I didn't eat the salad because I am a vegetarian. I just never mentioned that to Adam. I didn't have the heart to tell Adam after he went through all the trouble of getting this food for us. So when he wasn't looking I put it in the sand and buried it. I know it is childish, but what was I suppose to say, 'sorry to tell you this but I don't eat meat because I think its kind of gross. '

We finally reach home at around 11p.m.,after playing in the water and laughing about nothing. It was fun and I realized Adam is really as nice as I had thought he was. When we were eating desert, chocolate covered strawberries, he offered me his strawberry when he saw I was done with mine. He gave me his jacket when we were walking to the car and opened my door for me when I was at the car.

I walked to my house after a kiss on the cheek from Adam. When I get in the house, it is pitch black and freezing. I run into the living room to freaked out to go upstairs by myself. I go for the comfy couch and land on something. I scream at the top of my lungs.

"Shit...Ambs. Its only me." I jump of the seat clutching my heart as I realize its Logan.

"what the cracker jacks? Why are you sitting in the house by yourself in the freezing cold and darkness?"

"I was waiting for you." How nice. NOT. Butthead. His f*ck buddy probably had to go home and now he needs a warm body. Jerk face.

"well...what do you want?" Butt head.

" Josh went to the hospital and I just wanted to tell you."

"WHAT?!" I saying running to get a bigger jacket and my cell phone.

"Jeez Ambs calm down. He is in his room now he had a concussion and we have to wake him up every half hour."

"oh. Next time mention that first dumbo." I say breathing a sigh of relief. "how in god's name did he get a concussion?" Stupid Logan must of convinced my brother to do something stupid. Uhhh. I make my way to Josh's room with Logan following behind me.

"We just went to surf and the wave hit him the wrong way and he got eaten by the water. I went in after him and grabbed him but when I pulled him back out he was knocked out." What the fish?! Logan saved Josh?!

"you saved him." With tears almost forming in my eyes as I look at Josh. He has cuts all over his right side from the rocks, and his head has a bandage wrapped around it.

"nah...I was just there at the right time. Besides he is like a brother to me, I couldn't let him sink alone."

At first I am totally speechless but then I find my voice and say, "thank you." I give the butthead a hug because even if he is stupid and horny, he does care sometimes.

"uhm." I look up and see Logan wincing in pain. Immediately I am angry. I was trying to be civil and all he can do is say I am not special and now I give painful hugs.

"sorry didn't know my hugs were so painful." I say leaving Josh's room. I run quietly down the stairs to grab something to eat because dinner was nonexistent, Logan is a butt, and seeing Josh all broken up freaks me out. He is so tough. He's my big brother you know the guy who makes sure I am alive and breathing and hidden from the evils for the world. Seeing him so broken is wrong. If Logan wasn't there and nobody saved Josh, I don't know what I would have done. I would be alone, like truly alone. I wouldn't have anyone around telling me to have fun or to be a little stupid. That's just wrong. A girl needs a brother to make sure she is sane.

In the kitchen I grab the ice cream and warm up a frozen pizza, I need comfort food. While the pizza is warming, I dig into the ice scream!

"hungry?"

"yeah." I say grumpily.

"you know your hugs don't hurt. I just hit the rocks a little when I was grabbing your brother out of the water, but that part doesn't make me sound as awesome."

"ummhum"

"so how was your date?"

"Look Logan you don't have to be nice to me. I know you could careless and I know you don't like Adam, so you can stop pretending."

"hey." I just ignore him continuing to eat my ice scream!. "Ambs...Ambs." I just walk to grab my pizza out of the oven , but as soon as I'm by the oven Logan's hands are around me holding me where I am standing. "I do care." He whispered into my ear. I could feel my heartbeat picking up and my fingertips tingling. I hate Logan. I can't even stay mad at him when he is touching me.

"so then why did you call Adam dumb shit?"

"oh...I was.." Drunk.

"yeah I know."

"well why do you care?"

"about?"

"whether I like Adam or not?"

"why do you think Adam is a dumb shit?"

"you know eating all this crap isn't going to make you feel better." He says changing the subject.

"yeah, but it kind of is comforting and besides I didn't really get to eat much." I reply letting him change the subject.

"why? Adam didn't feed you."

"no he did."

"He didn't know you where a vegetarian did he."

"no, wait how do you know I am a vegetarian?"

"Ambs I have known you since you were basically born. I do pay attention on occasions. You became a vegetarian in 4th grade when your class went on a field trip to a meat factory. "

"oh." Talk about a shocker. I never knew Logan paid so much attention. Wow. It makes me feel like such a biotch, I know nothing about him. I have known him all my life but all I know is he is sluty and hot. "I didn't realize you actually paid attention to me at all."

"of course I pay attention your Amby."

"right. So how come I know nothing about you?"

"maybe you are just a meanie."

"you are probably right, or maybe it's because you never share anything and when you do its about tapping something or other dirty things." He just laughs, but it is a real laugh. I can't even remember the last time I ever heard Logan laugh like that. " do you want to play truth or dare?"

"umm...okay, princess random."

"what better way to learn about you then to play truth or dare?" Duhr.

"right."

"so truth or dare?"

"truth."

"whats your favorite color? Oh no wait. Its green, right?" He smiles. " what is your favorite thing to do?"

"watch scary movies and eat artificial cherries with you." He says with a smile.

"how sweet but really?"

"no really I love scary movies and artificial cherries."

"okay." I say with a smug smile. I was so expecting him to say having sex. Glad to know I beat sex.

"truth or dare?"

"Dare!"

"I dare you to kiss me."

"yeah....NO! Give me a real dare. Not one you use to get sexual favors." Dirty child much? I mean really.

"fine...I dare you to drink the ice scream milk ."

"easy." I say gulping the milk stuff down. Yum. This may be gross but its ice scream. "truth or dare?"

"truth."

"what is a secret about yourself that you never told anyone?"

"If I told you it wouldn't be a secret." I give him a puppy dogface. " okay fine on Saturday mornings I wake up early to watch cartoons."

"that's not a secret everyone does that."

"okay...I have never stayed with a girl overnight."

"What? How ? You sleep with like everyone." I say. Logan looks a little hurt.

"yeah, but sleeping with a girl doesn't mean I have to stay the entire night with them."

"oh well I guess. Why?"

"this is truth or dare not twenty questions. Now truth or dare?"

"truth."

"okay what the most you have ever done to a guy." Once again, I tell you dirty child much?

"dude get your head out of the gutter and honestly you can answer that question yourself. I have kissed like 3 guys and you are the most frequently kissed one." I say the last part grudgingly. Somehow, even though I know I should be annoyed or pissed or regret the fact that I had my first real kiss with Logan, I can't. It was the most amazing kiss of my life. Thinking about it makes my entire body tingle and make my blood race.

He says ,"oh." but his calm tone doesn't match the smug look on his face. This also doesn't help either, knowing he loves the fact that he was my first real kiss.

" truth or dare?" I say before I say something stupid in front of him.

"dare."

"I dare you to withhold from having sex for a month." Now who has the smirk mister.

"easy...done."

"really that easily?"

" Contrary to popular belief I have not slept with that many girls. Chicks lie and also I can prove I am not a 'man-whore.'"

"right." I say with a smile plastered on my face.

Rolling his eyes he says, "truth or dare?"

"truth."

"why don't you put your paintings in the art gallery?" He says getting serious again, which sucks because talking about him being a man-whore is so much easier than talking about me.

"Wait. How do you know my paintings have a spot offered to them?"

" Oh because I have photography with Mrs. James and I saw the paintings."

"right...well because they are just whatever and being an artist isn't really a career and also my parents wouldn't approve."

"have you ever thought that maybe they don't have your best interest at heart?" He is so stupid. They do care. I think and hope.

"what do you know? Do you even have any goals?"

"yeah I want to be a surgeon. I have a academic and football scholarship lined up from UCLA and Stanford. " My mouth dropped. He is like McSteamy from Grey's Anatomy. He will probably have hot sex in the on-call room with nurses too.

"y-you want to be a surgeon and you have an academic scholarship lined up?"

"yeah, why do you think I have so many free periods? I took college courses throughout high school and am done with 2 years of college."

"okay wow. I thought you were just being a stupid jock and ditching. WAIT! College classes like calculus?" All this time I thought Logan was an airhead. Okay not an airhead but more average.

"yeah why?"

"Logan, How much do you love me?"

"hmmm" He says pretending to think.

"do you love me enough to tutor me? Please. I am failing calculus and I need someone to teach me. I will be your best friend. Please." Jesus, I love Logan.

"okay fine. I do like the idea of being your teacher." Somehow, I think that has little to do with calculus and a lot to do with foreplay.

"really? Thank you so much. I freaking love you." As soon as the words escape my lips, I see Logan's expression change.

"yeah...we should probably go wake up your brother." Awkward much?

"okay." I jump out of my seat and give him a hug and again he winces. I step back and start taking his shirt off. If you are thinking I am strip teasing or some crazy crap like that get your head out of the gutter. I am just looking at where he got hurt. So like I was saying I am lifting his shirt off and I see big gashes on his side, but growing up with two boys makes me immune to gross injuries. I run my hand over his gashes. "Logan didn't you have a doctor look at these." Dang the boy has a nice body. His chest is nicely tanned and his eight pack is nice and hard but not grossly, where if you press your body against it all you would feel is hard bumps. Not that I am thinking about pressing my body against him.

"nah...I was making sure your brother was alright."

"really and I thought it was your fear of doctors."

"I am not scared."

"really so if I was to take you to the ER right now you wouldn't flip out?"

"okay maybe a little but last time I was at the hospital my mom died." As soon as he says this, I feel super guilty. Okay note to self-stay away from parents and hospitals when talking to Logan. I guess I never saw it like that. I loved Mrs. Clifton to death and she wasn't even my mom, which make me realize how much it must have broken Logan's heart when she died.

"I never said fearing the hospital was bad or anything. Why didn't you call me when you were going to the hospital? I would have came."

"yeah I did ,but you never answered."

"oh...sorry. I am so stupid sometimes. Come on lets go wake up brother dearest."

"can I have my shirt back?"

"no I think I like you better shirtless." I blurt out. My cheeks immediately turn red. I hate when this happens. When you are thinking about something and are suppose to be answering something else.

"oh really." He says raising an eyebrow and leaning down. Crap. Stupid Logan. "I knew you wanted me." His husky voice whispers into my ear. His lips softly kiss me on the neck. I let out a loud gulp and mentally curse at my hands for tingling to touch him.

"W-we should wake up Josh. Don't want him to never open his eyes again now do we...he-he."

Logan leans down to me less than a inch away from my lips while starring into my eyes with his beautiful blue eyes and then just grabs his shirt out of my hand. I totally knew he was reaching for his shirt and not about to kiss me.

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