10 Trauma

"Aaron, wait!" came a voice from behind as Aaron walked towards the stairs to go back to the study room.

Aaron halted his steps and turned around to look at the beautiful woman who was walking with quick strides on high heels. It looked as if a model from earth was walking on a fashion show ramp.

"Mom, You are back!" Aaron said with a smile.

"Aaron are you mad at mommy? Why did ignore me?" Julia said with a sad expression and watery eyes.

"Ah! when did I ignore mom?" Aaron asked stunned looking at those teary eyes.

"Please don't be mad, mommy won't break her promise ever again. Please." Julia said as she hugged Aaron tightly getting on her knees.

Aaron was confused am I daydreaming right now? What's going on? When did I ignore her? Is this one of her pranks? Isn't this the first time we are meeting yesterday morning?

Before he could react to what was happening he felt himself hugged suddenly. This brought him back to his senses. He could feel Julia's body shivering as if a child who had woken up from a nightmare.

"Mom, I am confused what are you talking about? I am not mad at you at all! Why would I be mad? Tell me." Aaron said as he hugged her back.

"Then, you are not mad? You won't ignore me? I'm sorry, I didn't think I would be stuck at work overnight. I definitely didn't do it on purpose!" Julia said as she continued hugging Aaron. Her shivering seemed to have eased.

"I'm not mad at all. Are you talking about teaching me? Oh! didn't I say you have to teach me in your free time? Why would I be angry at you for working? Anyways, when did I ignore you? Isn't this the first time I am seeing you since yesterday?" Aaron said.

"No, I was in your dad's office when you came in. You didn't even look at me. It was so terrible. It hurt so much. Don't do that to mommy again." Julia said while cupping Aarons face with both her trembling hands. As she looked into Aaron's eyes.

"You were in the office? I didn't see you at all. I did not deliberately ignore you. Honest." Aaron said.

"You didn't?" Julia said as she hugged him again.

"No, I was thinking about a few things I had just read, so I was distracted until I heard Dad's voice calling me out," Aaron he explains his actions.

"What's going on? Julia, you are back?... What happened? Why are you crying? Did something happen at work?" Another female voice was heard as another beauty walked and stood beside them.

"..." both of them stayed silent.

"Come on tell me, you are scaring me!" Hana said with a panicked face.

"It was just a misunderstanding. Mom thought that I was mad at her and ignoring her. She felt bad for not starting my Weapon enchanting and Array formation lecture yesterday after dinner as she had promised due to her work. I was called to dad's office. I was distracted by my thoughts so I did not see her which lead to her believing that I was ignoring her deliberately. I just didn't expect her to be in dad's office." Aaron said while still being hugged by Julia.

Hana's face and complexion got better after hearing this. She continued to look at Julia, she seemed to be thinking of something. Her face changed again as she said.

"Julia, you are still blaming yourself, aren't you? I am really stupid! I thought after all these years you would have overcome that incident by now. I said it back then to you and I'll say it again it was not your fault. Stop blaming yourself. It seems I and Alan will have to talk to you about this again. I am really furious! You are hiding things from us. Are we not friends anymore Julia?" Hana said with concern and as if scolding Julia.

Julia didn't reply to Hana, she still continued to hug Aaron.

Aaron, however, felt left out as he didn't know about this 'incident' that Hana was speaking about. Nothing in his memory matched with Julia's current behaviour.

"What happened? Why would Mom act like this? She seems very scared of something. What is this 'incident' you are talking about?" Aaron asked looking at Hana.

Hana didn't say anything. She kept looking at Julia with concern and anger.

"MOM! What happened?" Aaron shouted as Hana seemed to be lost in thoughts.

"Let's go to my office first," Hana said as she took a deep look at Julia once more.

Julia didn't say anything, she stood up while Aaron still in her arms. She followed Hana as her eyes didn't move from Aaron's face for a single moment.

This made Aaron more and more worried about her. But he calmed himself down as he recollected what Hana had said.

Inside Hana's office, Hana poured two cups of tea and placed one in front of Julia as she said in a commanding tone 'Drink'.

Julia who had Aaron in her lap as she hugged him finally loosened her grip and picked up the cup and took a few sips as she still remained silent.

Aaron who was in Julia's lap kept staring at Hana intently for answers.

"It was a few months after we both got married to your father, Julia had an argument with her sick father. I don't know about the details of the argument as both Alan and I gave her privacy and choose not to interfere in it. Julia used to always have a fiery temperament back then. So she completely stopped talking to her father. Months went by like this until one day we received the news that her father passed away. Although he was sick, it was not to the point that he would die in only a matter of months. It was abnormal but it was still a natural death instead of being caused by his illness. Julia and all of us went to the funeral. You know how people like to speculate with no evidence, saying anything that they like or think would be the cause for the sudden death. Someone made a random point that Julia had had an argument with her father months ago which made him heartbroken and hence he died due to a weak heart fill with grievances. It made no sense as that argument was completely not a big deal at all. It was Julia's stubbornness that made it stick out too much. This rumours spread like fire among her relatives. Julia also heard this. You can guess what happened next. This silly girl went into a full self-blame mode. It took us days likely a week to stop her from blaming herself. She seemed better, at least that's what we thought. I had almost forgotten about this matter until today as I saw her with that same expression of guilt and self-blame on her face. And her silence to my question answered it all." Hana said as her face turned back to gentle and warm that it used to be.

Aaron heard Hana carefully. He never would have thought that Julia who was always cheerful and naughty at times would be affected by something like this.

There are no doctors in this world that are qualified to deal with psychological traumas like these.

Aaron had no qualification to help her either. But he knew that people who have a self-blaming tendency need to be taken care of by people close to them. No matter what one was facing a family's support can do wonders.

So he made the decision to make sure that all of his family members well being was his responsibility. Other people were not of any significance to Aaron but his family was of utmost importance to him.

Looking back at Julia he gave a gentle and sweet smile as he said.

"Mom, I am sorry! I made you feel like this. But mom you don't have to blame yourself for what happened back then. Maybe it is true, maybe it is not. All you can do is ask grandpa to forgive you. I have never met him before but I think he would definitely forgive you. You are his daughter after all. Don't think too much about what this outsider think or say. Just look back at the time you spent with your father as you grew up. You will know whether what they are saying is true or bogus. Let's say that you and Aoife had an argument. Which is normal in a healthy family. Would you feel at ease if Aoife was blaming her self because of what these outsiders were saying? You will have your answer. If you still feel that it was your fault, visit his grave. Ask for his forgiveness. That is all you can do! And please don't hide your trouble from us in the future. Only then will we be a strong family. Everyone has flaws and makes mistakes. Sometimes you get to correct them sometimes you don't. You blaming yourself will only cause harm to your health which is unacceptable to me. So cheer up! I know my mother is strong. If you think it is difficult for yourself to visit him alone ask anyone of us to accompany you. Seeing you shivering like that really worried us. I hope that you can free yourself from this guilt." Aaron said and hugged Julia at the end.