Chapter 16 - Home Or Hell.

Natalia's P.O.V.

"NATALIA!!....NATALIA, ARE YOU READY YET?....NATALIA!!"

"You do realise he's not gonna stop shouting until you answer him, right"

"Yer well, hopefully, he'll get the hint that I don't wanna go and leave here without me"

"NATALIA!!, WE'VE GOT TO GO!!"

I roll my eyes.

"You can't miss your grandparents funeral, Nat"

"Why not? it's not like they're my real grandparents"

"Don't talk like that sweetheart, please"

Brody comes over and places his hands on my shoulders.

"Don't shut off your emotions again, Nat, you really scared us all yesterday"

"Yer, please don't remind me off that, I don't exactly want to be reminded of the moment I went all Hulk smash on my bedroom in front of the one person I didn't want too"

"Well, if it makes you feel any better sweetheart, he looked genuinely hurt and worried seeing you in that state"

"I doubt it Brody, Cole doesn't possess those types of feelings"

"Sure he does, we all do, it's just some of us are better at hiding it than others"

"Like me?"

"Exactly"

I look up at Brody and smile which he returns.

"If you don't remove your hands from my mate in the next second, I'll rip out your throat and feed it to my prisoners"

Urgh!!.

"Speak of the devil and he appears"

"I'll take that as a compliment, mi amor"

"Please do, alls you need is the horns and cape and you'd be a living breathing Lucifer"

I stand up and go over to my bed to sort out my bag.

"I love it when you talk nice to me, babe, it makes me feel so loved"

"Go and f**k yourself, Cole, we all know you want too, oh and don't call me babe, the last time I checked I was a badass wolf, not some filthy, stinking pig"

"Are you kidding me, Nat?, I can't call you babe but you'll let him call you sweetheart"

He heard that? urgh!!, I bet the bastard was eavesdropping.

"There's a difference between you and him Cole"

"Oh yer and what's that?"

"I actually like him, I don't like you"

"Aww, babe, you wound me"

Asshole.

"Anyway, are you ready? because we need to go"

"Would you care at all if I told you for the umpteenth time that I really don't wanna go?"

"Oh and why's that? because you don't wanna see your parents? you don't wanna see the pack? or is it because you'd rather bury your head in the sand just like you have been doing, cutting off your emotions until you burst again only then you'll feel guilty because you missed out on saying one last goodbye to the two people on this planet who you loved the most in this world?"

Cole was now standing right in front of me and I hated it because it was invoking feelings deep inside of me that I hoped were dead.

"Hate me all you want Nat, hate our parents, hate the f*****g pack for all I care just...just don't make this decision because of how much you hate all of us"

Urgh!!, I hate it when he's right, he may be a jackass but he's a rational jackass, if that's even possible.

Myself and Cole were staring into each other's eyes like we were the only two people in the room, my eyes were full of confusion as to why I'm feeling the way that I do whilst Cole's eyes were filled with hope....so much hope.

"What the hell is going on up here? we need to get going, are you ready, Natalia?"

Cole pleads me with his eyes to say yes, I really didn't want too but then I heard him say something through our mate link which brought tears to my eyes but I didn't let a single one drop.

"Remember what nanny and grandpa used to say, Nattie, love more than you hate, love nanny and grandpa more than you hate us"

"Are you ok, Nat?"

I blink away my tears and put on my hard face as I grab my things from my bed.

"I'm fine, let's go"

I briskly walk out of my room and head downstairs where I was greeted by a frantic Emily who was happy to see me, I guess she's the smarter one of the bunch and knew there was a high chance I wouldn't go.

"There you are, I didn't think you were coming"

"I wasn't but I changed my mind"

"What changed it?"

"Not what....who"

I put on my leather jacket and fix my hair, I could tell Emily was confused by what I said but thankfully, she didn't question me which I was grateful for because if I told her that it was Cole who had managed to convince me to go then she wouldn't shut up about it and I'm not in the mood for her obsessiveness today.

"Natalia, go and change"

"Cole, no"

I go to leave but was stopped by my asshole ex-mate who used his werewolf speed to stand in front of me.

"Go and change, now"

I look down at my outfit and a wicked smirk makes it's way onto my face, I look up at Cole who was confused and I hate to admit it but he actually looks pretty sexy when he's confused.

I lean in close to him and brush my lips against his ear, his body went stiff and I could smell the scent of confusion and lust dripping off him.

"Suck my d**k, Cole"

I brush past him and head over to Brody's car getting in the front passenger seat smiling like a Cheshire cat and feeling proud, I know it was a cheap shot but damn did it feel good besides, I look hot today and I wasn't gonna change because that douchetard told me too.

Everyone piled into their cars and I couldn't help but chuckle when I saw how angry and annoyed Cole was when he realised I was riding in Brody's car, he was so pissed that he almost ripped the door to his wagon off it's hinges, we all then set off for The Dark Shadows pack and I felt physically sick at what was awaiting me in the next few hours.

A Few Hours Later....

"Chris Hemsworth"

"What? Chris Hemsworth, are you crazy?"

"Well, you were practically drooling over him when we watched the Marvel series together"

"I also drooled over Jamie Dornan when I watched Fifty Shades Of Grey doesn't mean I'd marry the guy"

"Wait, you watched Fifty Shades Of Grey?"

"Yep, all three movies and I read all five of the books"

"Five? there are five books?"

"Yer, you should give them a try"

"Erm no thanks, I'm not really into the whole tie me up and spank me thing"

"Really?...shame"

I look out of the window and smirk which widened when I heard Brody mutter kinky bitch under his breath.

"Wow, this place is huge"

I quickly glance at Brody before looking out of the front window and my heartbeat started to race when I saw my parents packhouse, my old home.

"Don't worry ok, everything's gonna be fine"

Brody gently grabs hold of my hand and rubs the back of it with his thumb, I instantly felt my heartbeat slow down and return back to normal.

Brody pulls up his car onto the driveway parking behind alpha Jays car, quite a few of us have come today to attend my grandparents funeral tomorrow, they were a well respected alpha and Luna and alpha Jays pack won't be the only ones here to pay their last respects.

"Are you ready, sweetheart?"

"Ready to face my demons?"

I look at Brody and smirk.

"Hell yeah"

Brody smirks back, we then get out of his car and I felt my heartbeat start to race once again when I looked around the huge mansion, memories flooded my mind and I felt my big, strong wall start to crumble slightly.

"Stay strong Natalia, you're a badass bitch now, nobody and I mean NOBODY can hurt us ever again, I promise you"

"I know, Lucky, it's just being back here again...I honestly never thought I'd see this place again"

"Don't worry, we won't be here for long, we're just here to say our goodbyes and then we can go back home"

"Home...have I even got a home?"

"Of course you have and you've got people who love you, don't ever forget that, ok?"

"I won't"

"Hey, is everything ok?"

Brody breaks me from my mind link with my wolf, I look up and see that he's looking at me with concern.

"Everythings great, why wouldn't it be?"

"You zoned out, I thought you were panicking again"

Aww, he's so cute when he's worried.

"I'm fine, Brody, I promise"

"Good"

He smiles grabbing hold of my hand and kissing the back of it.

"Because I didn't spend all of that time training you just for you to p***y out on me"

"Asshole"

He chuckles.

"Natalia"

Oh my god.

My body stiffens, my smile drops, my grip on Brody's hand tightened and my heart starts to beat at a rapid pace, I'm not ready for this, I'm not ready to see these people yet.

I turn my head to my right and I found myself almost choking for air when I saw my parents looking at me with happiness and relief on their faces and tears in their eyes.

"My baby"

My momma whispered as she tried to approach me but I panicked and went into self protect mode.

"NO!!"

"What the hell? how did she do that?"

I tightly closed my eyes and covered my ears with my hands as Lucky sang a chant to keep me calm and sane.

"Sweetheart, can you hear me?....Natalia, answer me, dammit"

I continued to listen to Luckys chant until I heard my brother's voice breaking through, he's trying to mind link me.

"Natalia, baby girl, please drop your orb shield"

I shake my head.

"They're gonna hurt me, Angelo, I can feel it"

"No they're not, I won't let them"

"You can't stop them, they used their alpha command on you"

"I don't care, I'll protect you now drop the shield"

"I..I can't"

I really wanted too so that I could prove to them and everyone else that I'm no longer a scared little girl who they can abuse and torture anymore but I guess deep down that's all I am, I'm just a scared, little, defenceless girl who is weakened by the mere sight of her own parents, I can learn all of the self-defence moves in the world and master as many weapons as I want but it won't change who I really am.

"Drop the shield, Natalia"

"What? why, Lucky?"

"Just trust me, Natalia, ok but more importantly....trust Angelo"

I open my eyes and look at Angelo, he gave me a reassuring smile and I instantly felt safe, I dropped the orb shield and he immediately engulfed me in a hug.

"I'll keep you safe, I promise"

Angelo stroked my hair and I smiled into his neck.

"I know you will"

"Nattie baby"

I pull apart from Angelo and look at my parents or more like glare at them.

"It's Natalia to you two"

My momma and dad flinched and looked hurt but I didn't care.

"Bebe please listen to us, we're really, really...."

"Sorry? yer you are, you're both a pair of sorry assholes, you're both sorry excuses for parents, sorry excuses for an alpha and Luna, a sorry pair of..."

"ENOUGH!!, don't disrespect your parents like that ever again, Natalia"

"Oh come on big brother you know better than anyone here that these two aren't my parents"

Cole looked disgusted at me once again referring to him as my big brother whilst my parents looked horrified.

"How did you..."

"Find out? that's not important, what is important is that you're not my parents so you can stop this fake pity party you're having for yourselves and you can stop pretending that you actually give a shit about me because everyone here knows that you don't"

"Natalia, please"

My father pleads as he takes a cautious step towards me, I kept my eyes firmly on him and I noticed that Angelo and Brody were both watching him like hawks as well, so was Cole but his stare wasn't as intense as theirs.

Hmm, I wonder why?.

Is it because he doesn't know about all of the torture his parents inflicted on me? or is it because he really doesn't care about me? I'm gonna go with them both seeing as Cole has more or less made it clear that he doesn't give a shit about me and considering who Cole is, I highly doubt that he's been living the past twelve years being completely oblivious to everything that has been going on around him.

I looked up and panicked slightly when I saw my father coming closer to me.

"Stay where you are, you're close enough"

I hold my hand out and backed up into Angelo as my father closed his eyes and scrunched his face up in pain, I really wish it was physical pain but sadly it was just emotional pain...I'm assuming, anyway, he opened his tear filled eyes and looked at me.

"Bebita, please...I'm, I mean we, we are really, really sorry, we really truly are, we regret everything and I mean everything that we put you through and we really wish that we could change it but we can't"

"Your father is right Natalia, we're really sorry and we hope that you can accept our apologies and forgive us"

What the f**k? are they being serious? I look at my parents with a look like they've grown five heads each with Donald Trumps face on them, they must be off their freaking rockers if they think I'll ever accept their pathetic apologies or forgive them.

"I'm sorry momma and dad....actually, you know what, no I'm not sorry because I've got nothing to apologise for, if you both think you can stand there crying a few crocodile tears, give me a weak ass apology and then have the audacity to ask me for my forgiveness and expect me to accept it and move on like nothing ever happened then you both are seriously f*****g deluded"

"Nat..."

"No, don't Nat me dad, this whole pack has spent twelve years torturing me and now you expect me to believe that you're sorry"

"We are, Natalia"

"Ok then, what are you sorry for?"

I ask whilst crossing my arms over my chest.

"What?"

"What are you sorry for? to truly apologise to someone you need to firstly, acknowledge what you're apologising for and why you're apologising to them and secondly, you have to f*****g mean it, so tell me, what are you sorry for?"

My parents look at each other and it was almost comical seeing them try to remember what and why they're apologising to me.

"It's actually quite sad that you don't even know why you're apologising to me and I don't have the time nor the patience to wanna school you both on everything you've done to me"

I take a deep breath.

"Look, I'm not here to play happy families or to build bridges with you toxic people, I'm only here to do one thing and one thing only and that is to say goodbye to my grandparents and once I've done that I'm leaving here and going back home"

"What? but...but this is your home"

I chuckle at my mother's words.

"You're joking, right?"

She shakes her head no.

"This isn't my home momma, it's my own personal hell"

"Please don't say that, bebe"

I look at my father and a small part of me, a really, really small part of me kind of felt sorry for him but I quickly forgot about it, he doesn't deserve my pity.

"I'm sorry dad but this place hasn't been my home in a very long time"

I walk away from my parents with a straight back and my head held high looking like a strong, confident woman but deep down inside of me I didn't feel like the type of woman that I was perceiving myself to be.