Chapter 230 - 33: What Was In Your Heart?

The first floor was watches and jewels, sparkling in the windows appealingly. The second floor was shoes, the third flower clothing… all the things that women liked.

A lot of ladies were lingering in front of the mirrors, turning and checking their images with the clothes, eagerness, and satisfaction on their faces. Comparing herself to all these women, Kate felt that she didn't deserve to be called a lady. As the proverb says, you cannot make a crab walk straight.

Kate strolled aimlessly to the fifth floor. Arts and crafts didn't pique interest either. She was about to turn back to the elevator when something shiny attracted her attention.

Kate spent an afternoon and half of the evening outside. Her phone ran out of power, and the mall was still open. She ate something in a small restaurant and called a cab home.

When she saw Tristan's shoes in the hallway, she was surprised. Raising her head, she saw he was sitting on the couch. He heard her come in and asked, "Where did you go? Why did you turn off your phone?"

"Shopping." She said calmly.

Tristan looked at her as if to check what she had gained and then ordered habitually, "Come here."

Kate followed. Tristan grabbed one of her hands and spread her palm, and then another one. He touched the scar and asked, "Does it hurt?"

She paused a little and said, "No."

Her skin healed fast, and there was only a faint scar, across one of the principal lines of her palm, like a secondary line.

He touched it softly with his thumb and then suddenly pulled it to his lips and kissed it.

The warmth transmitted to her like a small lightning bolt to her brain. She suppressed the impulse to pull her hand back and said, "How did you know?"

"There was blood on the glass."

"I didn't know that room…"

"OK." Tristan released her hand finally.

"I bought this." Kate took out a fancy looking packaging box, opened it, and then put it on the coffee table. It was a crystal frame with a simple shape.

"You came back so late just because of this?"

She nodded. "Couldn't find one exactly the same as that one."

And then she couldn't help adding in a low voice. "It is really expensive."

A few hundred dollars for a photo frame. Her heart was aching when she paid for it.

Tristan observed the crystal frame for some time. As she was about to leave for her bedroom, he held her hand and said, "Stay a while with me."

Kate sat back. Tristan pressed the remote, and the room turned dark.

She was held in his arms and leaned on the back of the couch. He gave a sigh of relief.

Silence followed.

In the darkness, it was all quiet except for the sound of their breath. The flowing of air seemed audible too.

Kate suddenly wondered whom Tristan took her as at this moment.

After a while, Tristan said, "The day before yesterday was the anniversary of the day she passed away."

Kate was shocked. No wonder he smoked so many cigarettes. In her impression, he was moderate on drinking and smoking. Of course, so was she in other aspects.

"We knew each other in college."

"I was depressed due to some changes in the past when I entered college. And I was not used to life in college. Besides schoolwork, playing basketball, and taking some part-time jobs were my life. I was like a robot until she showed up."

"She changed my life and made me lively. She was out-going, with extensive hobbies and talents. The painting you picked was one of her works she gave to Monica. She asked her to show it when there was a chance and see if anyone wants to buy it."

"I just knew about it."

"Monica was her roommate in college and her best friend. It is the painting she made in the last period of her life. You are right. It is about the love of life."

He spoke calmly as usual as if he was just telling the story of an unrelated person. She was shocked at his last words. She was a layman of arts, but probably because she knew nothing of techniques, she could easily see the nature of the work. The nature of people, in her understanding, was life, surviving, and the spirit that supported it.

Hearing the term "the last period", Kate asked, "How did she…"

"Bone cancer."

When Tristan opened his mouth again, his voice was husky. "It was a middle stage when it was found. The doctor said she needed to have an amputation. She hesitated. I was busy with the expansion of my business and wasn't at home or noticed her changes. When I found out, cancer had already spread, and even amputation wouldn't help."

When he said, "wouldn't help," his voice finally showed the emotion of sadness.

As he became silent, the air seemed to turn solid.

Kate was surprised to find that Tristan rarely showed his emotion, but once he showed, his emotion spread to the air around and made anyone near him feel it.

She thought she should not feel sympathy for this person, but on second thought, at this moment, he was just a normal man who had lost his true love. She thought he was emotionless, but he wasn't.

He had also made mistakes, did something irremediable, and had been weak.

She felt her eyes were itchy, but she didn't dare to touch them. She was afraid the movement would disturb him, and she didn't want him to know her reaction either.

After some time, Tristan continued, "I have thought why I had no reaction to that painting. I didn't even see the basic meaning of that painting. I don't even have your instinct feeling. Do you know why?"

Kate didn't expect he would ask her and just repeated, "Why?"

He raised his hand to push back his hair and showed some frustration, "Because there were too many things in my heart. We were separated by those things."

He sighed, "We were far away eight years ago, and so are we now."

Kate blinked her eyes. "What was in your heart?"

He didn't expect her to ask so straightforwardly. He kept silent for a while, touched her hand, and pinched it, "You don't know, and you don't need to know."

***

When Tristan got home, he heard some conversation in French. He saw a woman sitting on the couch cross-legged. He frowned slightly.

She had just washed her hair and didn't comb it. The hair was all messy, like a bird's nest on her head.

She had a pack of snacks in her hand. At the sight of him, her face flushed with surprise. She stretched her legs to stand up, and the package in her hand tilted, and half a bag of potato ch.i.p.s fell to the floor.

Tristan clearly saw two ch.i.p.s roll off of her pajamas and fall onto the carpet. And looking down at the snow-white carpet, besides a pile of ch.i.p.s, there were two slippers far apart, one of them with its sole facing up.

The fat cat raised its head from the couch. Lucy's big face had something brown and sticky on it, in the same color as the stuff on the plate in front of it. Tristan didn't dare to look closely at what it was.

He suppressed his disgust and asked, "Laura has not come back yet?"

Kate nodded.

The TV was playing a French movie. The gray color scene, some bars, and cells, men in uniforms walked back and forth…Tristan gave it a glance and thought she was really studying something.

He drew back his attention from the screen and fell on Kate's face again, said shortly, "Ten minutes. Clean up all this mess."

"Ten minutes does not seem like enough." Kate wrung her hands. Her pajama top was misaligned.

"Half an hour then." He pointed at the silly cat that was l.i.c.k.i.n.g the plate, "Clean her up too."

Tristan went back to his room to take a shower and went to his study. When he passed the living room, he said, "Turn down the volume a little bit."

Kate, who was squatting there and shaking the carpet, answered him OK.

Tristan sat at his desk, turned on the computer, checked his email, and opened some files to read, but his attention was drawn to some other place.

Laura was sick yesterday and asked to leave for half the day. Tristan went back and found the living room wasn't as clean and tidy as usual. He cleaned it up without further thought. Today was simply an upgraded edition of yesterday.

Their relations seemed to develop after the in-depth talk the night before. Kate was gentler and talked a little bit more, but at the same time, the defects in her had been exposed gradually.

This forced Tristan to look into an issue he had ignored -there were differences between them in various aspects, like lifestyle, family background, education, and social experiences.

As he was reflecting, there was a knock on the door, and Kate brought tea. She had combed her hair, changed into clean clothes, and looked much better.

She put the cup down and said, "Take it while it is hot." Seeing him put his fingers to his temple, she asked, "Are you tired? Want me to massage it for you?"

He glanced at her with surprise and then acquiesced.

Kate walked behind him and took a look at his computer screen. She was surprised to see a PowerPoint file with tables, "Complicated file. Did you do it?"

"My staff did."

She said oh and then put her slender fingers on his temples and pressed, kneaded, rubbed, and pinched. Her manner was professional, and the massage was very comfortable.

Tristan sighed and asked, "Not bad. Where did you learn this?"

"The masseuse in the Spa Center."

He was shocked, "But you didn't work there, did you?"

"Uh," She prevaricates, "Sometimes they were short-handed and would ask for help temporarily."

Tristan didn't say anything more.

A moment later, he sniffed and said, "What smell is it?"

"I bought a new perfume. Do you like it?" She put her hand to his face.

He raised his hand to fend off and said, "It is not so nice. Go wash it off."

"OK." Kate turned, and her sleeve swept the cup on the edge of the desk, and the cup fell, and the water spilled onto the keyboard.

She gave out a cry and pulled a piece of tissue paper to dry it hurriedly, but Tristan grabbed her wrist and said, "Let it be."

He raised his head to stare at her. Kate apologized hurriedly, "I am sorry. I was too clumsy."

Tristan fixed his eyes on her for at least a few seconds and then turned to see the screen, waved his hand, and said, "Just go."

Kate took a long breath when she got out of the room.

It was dangerous. Tristan's eyes were sharp. One casual scan by him and her heart would start beating fast.

Nothing happened for the rest of the evening.

The next morning, Tristan saw Kate bringing a plate of toast to the table.

"Toasts with peanut butter. Do you want to?"

Is she saying that? She put her finger with some remains of peanut butter to her mouth and licked it.

"Peanut butter is my favorite. Try one?"

"I am allergic to peanuts." He shook his head.

She bit the toast and showed some satisfaction as the dimples on her cheek became visible. Tristan curled his lips down.

He was just eating the soup when he heard her slurping. "Don't make sounds while drinking." He said. The sound disappeared, but soon she started to sneeze. "What is the matter with you?"

"I don't know…probably something got into my nose."

He just wanted to say you deserve it when she fetched a piece of tissue and blew her nose loudly.

Finally, she finished her fussing and said in relief, "OK now."

Tristan looked at his breakfast before him and put down the fork. He wiped his hand with the napkin and stood up. Before he left, he said, "Clean all this up."

As soon as he walked out of the room, she made a face for her victory. Peanut butter, she had learned from Laura that he was allergic to it.

After she brushed her teeth, she looked into the mirror and laughed. Her expression was no longer stiffened. It was natural and lively.

That was right. A plan was being executed.