12 Fragile Bonds 3.3

Beeep. The sound came from across the room next to her bedside.

A text? I twist my body lifting myself from the desk chair walking over to me bed I grab my phone. Typing in the password to look at the message. It must be a mission! I think to myself. I don't usually text or get texts for anything else except getting and confirming missions normally. Briggs and I only talked in person when there was something to say. He always said texts where to impersonal. So, unless we were on a mission or training; we hardly spoke. Sometimes I got lonely.

"You awake?" The text reads. It was Alastar! What did he want so early? His next text came before I could reply.

"Come to breakfast with me. My treat and bring all your stuff. I'll be outside."

"On my way." I replied.

I found herself jumping up grabbing her bag and packed it with anything I could possibly need after his message not sure what to expect. Opening and running out my dorm room door and down the stairs I realized I forgot to let Jen know I was leaving already. Oh well, I shrug at the thought. When I don't answer I'll bet she'll figure it out. I need to talk to Alastar before class. Plus, I'm starving. I've been up since three a.m.; so there's no way I can turn down a breakfast invite. I didn't feel sleepy even though I lacked sleep due to my nightmares. Exiting the building, and saw Ben's car. He had already been parked outside waiting. He wasn't in his robes, he was dressed casual, his hair tied back, and no glasses. The sun had just begun to rise. The sky was on fire from the morning rays. Fire a flash of that horrible feeling came over me again like the flames that consumed me in my dream. I can still feel the heat on my skin it felt as if I was melting. I felt my body shiver as I tried to push away the fear that welled up in me. I made my way to Ben.

"Hi, I say sheepishly looking up at him. He however doesn't smile.

"We need to talk." His face serious as he turns and opens the door for me. I can feel my smile fall. How could I be so stupid. I had forgotten how just last night I had run away from this man and left him standing in the streets like an idiot. Of course he'd be pissed with me. I climb in. I watch as he shuts my door then walks around and climbs behind the wheel. Not saying a word he starts that car and pulls out in a direction to who knows where. I glance over his eyes transfixed on the road.

"Is there a reason you keep looking at me?" The sudden question makes me jump in my seat. I turn to him his eyes glance my way. His quizzical brow raised. However he's still not smiling.

"I'm sorry," I mumble. I watched his jaw tighten and release as if he was debating on saying something or not. I turn to look back out the window I was sorry. Sorry I was such a coward.

"I'm not mad you know. That'd be petty." I hear him say behind me as I still look out the window. "I'm not really a morning person. I 'm sorry I should have warned you Stace." I turned slightly to glance at him hearing the nickname. A whisk of a smile as he glanced my way, before returning his focus back to the road. I bite my bottom lip to keep it from quivering. Why did he need to break down all my defenses. The image of his dead face from my dream flashes before my eyes.

"Why do you have to be so damn nice and understanding all the time?" I say trying to fight back the fears inside me. He just shrugs.

"Why do you need to be so on guard and untrusting all the time?" I glare at his remark.

"I am not I just know that trust is earned and precious." I bark back.

He smiles, "And I'm trying like hell to earn it. Now why don't you tell me whats really eating at you."

"How did you?"

"Know something is bothering you?" He interjects. Its scary how he knows what I'm going to say hell even at times I swear he knows what I'm feeling. I didn't answer what could I say. I notice he glanced my way a few times as he drove waiting.

He pulled into a parking lot to what appeared to be empty restaurant that looked like a cottage. It had a rose garden in the back where we could enjoy our meal while enjoying the flowers. Biscuits and fruit where ordered and brought to the garden and was placed in the center of the table as we sat without exchanging a word. Many thoughts crossed my mind. However, what should I say? What do I tell him? The Truth?

"So what's up?" Ben finally said losing patience as he sat staring at me, at my head bent over. I glance up studying him. His face was filled with concern as he gazed looking to meet my eyes.

How could I tell him that I was scared that he was getting close to me that we should keep our distance. Especially because of a dream I had. He'd probably think I lost my mind that I was pushing him away because of a dream. However; it wasn't just the dream. I was was starting to care for him in such a short time as much if not more than I did For master Briggs in such a short time. This scared me. I knew nothing about Ben other then he had alternator motive being near me and being nice to me. But I, I was stupidly falling for his kindness and that scared me. I didn't want to trust and be hurt loosing someone again. I also didn't want him knowing I was that insecure.

"I just have really terrible nightmares. You know the ones you wake up from and it was so real that you can't shake the feeling that it will happen, or that it was real." I say trying to brush it off. "I just need more sleep so I'm not so emotional." I laugh. I watch him rip a bite of croissant off and roll it between his thumb and his fingers in thought before plopping it in his mouth. What was he thinking so hard for.

"How long?"

"How long what?" I ask back confused by the sudden question.

"How long since the nightmares started?" He replies taking another bite and popping into mouth thoughtfully. I took a grape and also took a bite. The sweetness of it's juices rolled down my throat as I watched his facial expression. Why did he care?

I shrugged "Started when I was a kid but after master Briggs died." I pause was I seriously going to tell him. His eyes met mine as if locking me into place. I couldn't look away.

Suddenly a sigh breaks the trance. "and there it is, guard up and ready to slam the door in my face once again." Ben announces throwing his hands up in an exaggerated expression. "And here all I was doing was worrying about what was troubling you before we got down to business."

"No one asked you to worry about me. I shouted. I slammed my fist on the table. I didn't know why but I felt cornered now and it pissed me off. "In fact I wish everyone would stop freaking worrying about me. I'm almost eighteen and I don't want any more people dying because they are worrying about me!" I blurt out the last part. Silence fills the awkwardness between us. I just want to go crawl into a hole. Ben's eyes become like spears of death as the glare at me disapprovingly.