9 Black Mail and the Decision 2.5

Masings' office was up a staircase in a hidden entry way behind the Buddhist alter it was the only room there. There were thirty steps to climb it was annoying, and so inconvenient for most people. At the door, there was a guard to monitor who went in and out. I hated Masing if I was being honest. I get bad vibes when I'm near him he makes me nervous. Alastar led the way to the office, and talked to Kain the monk who guarded Masing everywhere he went. Kain opened the door; this way you two.

"You're coming in with me?" I looked at Alastar then to Kain. Kain glares as I looked back at him it was filled with disgust as he shut the door behind us.

Once he was gone Alastar spoke. "Of course, I brought you, so I have to make sure I do my job right; all the way to then end." He pats my head.

"Yeah right; probably just to make sure things go your way." Without thinking I spat out these cold words accidentally. However; he just smiled as he patted my head like a little kid again.

"Get your hands off me, or I'll kick you in the shins." I say swiping at his hand as we walk further into Masings office.

"What are you two whispering about?" Masings' seemed annoyed turning to look at us as we walk in front of his desk. His face looked disgusted at the sight of me. I can't imagine him summoning me now let alone even wants me here like Alastar said.

"Friar Jarret I'll be honest I'm not sure if I should deem you a demon or use you as a powerful ally. I have decided that for the time being we will watch you, and see what you really are. That being said, I will give you a new master to train under, you will go on missions and if you prove yourself. I will overlook you and Master Briggs keeping your unique ability a secret. Tell me, I pride myself in readying spirit energy levels so how was it you were able to hide yours?"

"When I was six years old I learned a suppression incantation from Master Briggs that can lock spirit energy away so that it seemed I had none or little so I'd stop attracting shikigami to me." I say though the truth was it wasn't about the creatures at all it was really to keep the fellow brothers from knowing the power that lay in me.

"That makes me even more curious to know if we have truly seen your full potential than." I could feel my body wanting to quiver as he whispered in my ear. Circling me now like a vulture.

"I have nothing left to hide sir." I try to control my discomfort.

"We'll see; Kain! Bring in Sanders!" Masing had shouted out to his guard. Sanders' is a field monk mostly research. He's serious, and has no time for relaxing.

A few minutes later, a man walked in holding a big leather-bound book with a life root leaf from a red fern tree sticking out from the top. The man was older, his hair was silver with a clean-cut beard dyed brown.

"Sanders, I am appointing you Jarret's new master." Masing announced as the man came in standing nearer to us. The look on Sanders face became horrified it had lost color.

"With all due respect sir I am far too busy to take on an apprentice." He stuttered as he rejected the idea.

I see was the only reply Masing gave then dismissed the brother.

One after another; monks were brought in, and all declined taking the job. I could feel their fear their disgust with me. First, they hated me because they thought I was useless. Now I was something to fear, and they wanted nothing to do with me all over but for a different reason.

The last monk available came in. It was Talm one of the few that showed me kindness. Talm was dark skinned; he traveled here from a far place overseas to study. He never told me where though he said to move forward he had to forget the past.

"Talm I'm appointing you Jarret's master, I want you to watch over him." Masing stated the moment he came through the office door.

Here it comes just like the rest he'll make an excuses and leave.

"Brother Masing I have no excuses, but the fact is I don't trust this child. He lied to us all, and without trust a student and master relationship can't be formed so I'm not suited for this job." He bowed his head in complete rejection not even hiding how he truly felt then left only glancing at me for a second.

I couldn't look at him I knew he'd be afraid to, but his words cut me deep. I had lost his trust, when I trusted him as much as my own master. I looked up fighting back my tears of anger and sadness. Masing was smiling.

"It seems Jarret that once again you're not wanted here." He sneers looking down on me. "Everyone hates you even more than before. They looked at you as if you were some kind of demon, and I can't just let something everyone fears walk out of here with your power. Now what to do? I never did like you. You were always an eye sore to me."

I could feel mixed emotions swelling up in me as I listen. I looked down at my feet. I bit my lip as if to hold a beast from coming out I could taste blood from bitting so hard. As a Friar, I had no power to choose my master and there was no one in the world that would want to be near me if they could avoid it. Masings' words, and everyone echoed in my ears as if they had planned to torment me from the start. My legs were shaking I wanted to leave.

"Master Masing I myself would like to be Jarret's new master." The voice next to me spoke drowning out the voices echoing in my head. I could barely believe my ears. That's right Alastar had already said it before we came, but he has a motive. I felt relieved and sad all at once.

"Are you crazy, you want to train him just like Briggs did?" Masing looked furious his hands clutched tight. "Look what happened to him it was probably this creatures doing, he probably killed Briggs himself!" Masing was shouting. I wanted to speak I wanted to cry out, but no words would leave my mouth. Because of my promise to my last master before he died.

"The boy doesn't even try to deny it!" Masing now points at me trying to convince Alastar to side with the rest.

"He wouldn't!" Alastar spoke in my place. "Master Masing wasn't this all for the purpose to try and find him a master? If not then why did you summon him? If so then I will take him on." Alastar stood firm to the head Monk, refusing to be persuaded differently.

I could feel heat coming from Alastars hand as he placed it on my bowed head. I tried not to let him see how weak I was, that the words got to me. I wanted to smile, even if I was being used I was still needed.

"What say you Jarret will you work with Alastar as your master." Masing said clearing his throat at Alastar's challenging ton.

All I could do was nod my head, and turned to walk out. I wanted to hide the tears that were slowly dripping down my pale white cheeks. I wanted to escape, I had wanted to die not long ago, but at the same time I felt I wanted to live now. Descending the stairs, I felt a chill from the sudden touch of Alastar as he reached out placing his hand onto my back then removing it. I thought he was trying to comfort me, but he placed my hood over my head to cover my face. Taking my hand, he gently led me. His hand was so big compared to mine, and was so rough that you could tell he was a hard worker. Still I couldn't help thinking there was warmth, or maybe I was just hoping. I could hear all the brothers talking as I passed by. In whispered tones, they all agreed I was an abomination, and once again they all hated me. I was not welcomed there or accepted. Why was I born? Why was I saved? Why was I here? These thoughts crossed my mind. The door to the room was slammed shut. It echoed in the private medical dorm room. I just stood there in the middle of the room next to the bed. I could feel my mind fighting with itself as I tried to gain my strength, and composer as Briggs always told me to do. If I cried in front of Alastar no doubt he'd hold it against me. A man like him who's willing to blackmail me would be worse than Master Briggs who never let me cry in front of him. I could imagine his disgusted look if I let him see the expression upon my face now. I didn't want to look up I wouldn't give anyone the satisfaction of knowing that I was hurt.

Movement fluttered around me I could feel heat calm my shaking shoulders. I found myself laughing out loud in confusion yet the tears kept falling. I was feeling tied down like I was suffocating from this feeling of comfort that suddenly embraced me. In the arms of Alastar there was the smell of wild flowers and salt on his shirt. Emotions overwhelmed me. I cried for the first time in a long time as this man held me with no sign of releasing. I could feel his breath on my ear. I didn't hear what he said as he whispered in my ear, but his arms around my shoulders, and head as he pulled me tightly against his firm chest told me I could be wrong about him. I pray I was wrong about him. Because I felt like he was saying cry it out. I didn't have to hide and cry alone any more. So, in my heart, just this once I'll let someone comfort me. I want to believe.