32 Gone like Air

Fan Daiyu had trouble processing everything happening. Her mother's arms slowly want limp and her eyes closed peacefully. She still had a smile on her face. She looked like a sleeping beauty but she knew well enough that this time no prince would come and wake her up.

She was gone.

The only mother she ever had was gone.

She reached out to touch her but her body wouldn't listen to her. Her lips were trembling as she whispered her mother's name over and over again.

"Wake up! Mom. Mommy! Please don't leave me! Please wake up! Please stop sleeping!"

She knew very well that her mother was dead but her heart wouldn't admit it. She cried out for her but her pleads ended in deaf ears. No one answered her prayers. No one took pity in her pain. No one brought her mother back from death.

"Mother… Mother… Mother…"

She repeated it in hopes of wishing her back to life. In hopes of creating a miracle. She looked like a lost and abandoned sheep that strayed from its group. She couldn't understand. Her shaky voice rang out and echoed throwing knifes at everyone's hearts.

"Why…. Why did it have to be my mother… Why do I have to suffer so much… The darkness haunts me… My father hates me… My mother left me…

WHY CAN'T ANYBODY BRING HER BACK?!"

Everyone had already suspected Fan Ying's dislike for the child but no one knew why. He was her father that was a fact, so why the hatred?

Fan Ying felt all the questioning gazes but none of them mattered. His wife was gone. She was the only woman he had fallen for. She was the only one who complemented him but now she was gone and she left two children behind. They were the last proof of her existence. Unlike Daiyu, they looked like him and Yenay. They looked normal. They cried like any other children and slept like any other. His heart felt its emptiness filling up with joy at the sight of them.

He was brought out of his daze by a shout. Fan Daiyu was crying and holding onto his wife's corpse as if it was the last strand of life left on her body. He looked at her but he no longer felt the love he used to have for her. Looking at her grasping his wife's corpse instead made him feel loathing and disgust.

"SHUT UP!"

He didn't care if Morris saw his anger and he didn't care if others shivered at his scream. He just wanted to get rid of her.

"GET OUT!"

He stood up and hauled Daiyu out of the room. Everyone was shocked. He tossed his own daughter out and he wasn't gentle at all.

The small girl was choking out sobs and everyone could tell that her father had dislocated her arm.

Her small face was covered in tears and her aggrieved look was imprinted in everyone's hearts.

She looked destroyed. She was on her knees as her good arm reached out to grasp her father but it was violently kicked away as she let out a small scream of pain. She fell backwards and looked up at her father. Her gaze penetrated everyone's hearts. She looked like a cornered animal being hunted by its own owner. It was the last thing they saw before Fan Ying smashed the door shut and walked over to the twins with a gentle smile.

-Fan Daiyu-

[It hurts too much]

She understood it now. It was more painful to experience something and then lose it than never having it at all.

It hurt more than she could ever imagine.

[Can't it be different? Can't I be happy? I said I would fight against fate and against anything in my way but can I? I feel weak and desperate in front of them. I feel pain and suffering in the end.]

The same scenes replayed in her mind over and over again.

Blood. Lots of blood.

Her hands trembled as she held them up to view and she saw red. She had yet to realize that half of her outfit was filled with blood her mother had coughed out.

The scenes replayed repeatedly in her head. The blood, her mother's kiss, her father's glare, and her father's loathing. She felt her world spinning.

She couldn't stand up. She could barely even move. This wouldn't have been possible unless her father used his Qi.

[He wanted to kill me…]

Everything was too much. The pain and shock were too great.

Fan Daiyu looked at the closed door.

"Mommy… If only you knew how hard it is for me to keep on smiling like you taught me.

Mommy I miss you…cough* cough*"

She coughed ad gasped for air as she remembered the times she had spent with her mother. Every night she would come to her room and sing her to sleep. She would kiss her forehead and smile.

[Mommy… I miss your smile]

Whenever she cried out even if it was an act, she would come and comfort her.

[I miss your warmth.]

She remembered the lyrics she used to bring her out of the darkness.

[I miss your voice.]

She remembered the jokes she would say to make her laugh even though they weren't funny.

[I miss your laugh.]

She remembered every small aspect and caress her mother had given her.

[Mommy…..I miss you, mommy.]

"I miss you so much even though you just left. Why aren't you here? You said you would always be there for me! You said that whenever I shed a tear your heart felt pain so you would run to my side, but here I am. Crying. No one has come to my rescue. I'm shedding tears, so why aren't you here yet? Why can't you come back!?"

[Liar! Liar! Liar!]

She hit the ground again and again but it didn't take away the pain. Her breathing increased and she began gasping for air.

She couldn't breathe.